Page 2 of Not You Again
Adam gave Carly a genuinely apologetic look, then left.
She swallowed down a lump that had lodged in her throat. She knew she’d been unfair to Adam and later she’d regret her words, but she was also relieved by his departure. Carly approached the coffin and placed her palm on the closed lid. In there, Bruce wore the navy-blue suit and tie she’d picked out. Pinned on his jacket lapel was theStar Warsenamel pin she’d gotten him for his sixtieth birthday. He’d forever be sixty-four.
Carly studied her fingers instead of imagining him inside the box. She wasn’t ready to say goodbye, she realized. She wanted to explain that this was all just too much for her—too intense, and awful. Maybe she could come back tomorrow and visit the grave, when she was ready? But that was when she heard them fighting.
“What do you want me to say, Adam? I fucked up! I slept with him. I’m sorry,” Shireen shouted.
“Keep your voice down!” Adam’s own raw with emotion.
Carly frowned. What was she overhearing?
“I don’t know what else to say!” the woman exclaimed. “I just need to know if you’ll forgive me.”
There was a long stretch of silence. Carly realized that thiswas a private moment between two people, and she had no business listening in. She should definitely cover her ears or something.
Problem was, Carly was nosy.
“What did you expect me to do? You haven’t paid attention to me in years! We’re basically coworkers.”
“Coworkers don’t have sex, Shireen.”
“And neither do we!”
Carly slapped a hand across her mouth to keep in whatever noise was about to tumble out. Instead of sobs, she choked back incredulous giggles. How was it that on the worst day of her life, she was overhearing some of the best dialogue? Her eyes went wide as she focused on the coffin. “What do you think, Dad? Movie-worthy?”
But she was met with silence, because of course she was. For a moment, she’d been able to pretend like her dad was still there. Like they were having one of their old brainstorming sessions, where she’d rattle off a half-baked idea that he’d punch up. Who was she going to spitball with now?
She uncovered her mouth. “I miss you.”
The words came out easily because they were pure truth. She missed him. And in that moment, she knew where she finally needed to go.
The Last Showing movie theater was located off Main Street in the small, sleepy town of Julian, California. When she’d taken the key from her dress pocket and opened the doors, Carly wasn’t sure what to expect. Her dad had sent photos of the renovations he’d done, but to see the theater in real life was... surreal.
The place had been closed for a week, but the red-and-gold-flecked carpet was spotless. The warm white walls heldframed posters of upcoming and past film releases. Neon stars dangled from wires on the ceiling. The food counter had been wiped clean, and the glass cases that held rows and rows of candy were stacked and ready to sell. If she’d wanted, Carly could throw open the doors, turn on the overhead marquee and wait to see if anyone came in. That was probably what Bruce did every day.Usedto do.
Instead, she went behind the snack counter, tore open a package of Milk Duds and dumped the chewy morsels into an empty popcorn bucket. Then she ripped open a pack of gummy worms and let them fall in. She added Skittles, Swedish Fish, Twizzlers, M&Ms, Reese’s Pieces and mini Butterfinger Bites until the bucket was nearly full. Her dad called this a candy salad, their favorite treat.
Bruce also liked to add hot, buttery popcorn on top so everything melted together. He wasn’t there to tell her that, though.
He. Wasn’t. There.
Carly looked up from her tub of sugar. A “questionable” pot of joy any other day, but the thing felt as heavy as a brick in her hands. Her dad’s whole world had been movies. He’d gotten his first job as a PA on the set of a low-budget indie horror film when he was eighteen. But after forty-some-odd years of working his way up to cinematographer, he’d wanted a change of pace. He could’ve taken a cushy role as an adjunct professor at USC’s film school—a job he’d been offered. Instead, he’d done the least sensible thing imaginable: taken his savings, uprooted his Los Angeles life and bought a decrepit movie theater in a small town three hours away.
“I want to build something special—something of my own,” he’d excitedly told Carly over a greasy pancake brunch at the Tallyrand diner in Burbank, just a few blocks from hishouse and her apartment. He’d already begun renovations on the theater. “You’ll see, Carly girl!”
But she didn’t see, and neither did anyone in Julian. Because as Carly recently discovered, Bruce was in massive piles of debt. He’d taken out more loans than movie tickets sold. An exaggeration, but still... his gamble hadn’t paid off.
A few weeks ago, her dad had asked that she come visit so they could make his famous candy salad and watch the total solar eclipse together. He’d lived full-time in Julian for a year, and she hadn’t taken the three-hour drive down to see him. But Carly had no intention of coming to watch the eclipse—even if it was “rare and cinematic,” as her dad said. Because if she traveled to Julian, then she’d know for certain that he was never returning to Los Angeles. So she’d declined the invite, hoping he’d finally understand that his leaving had been the wrong decision.
Of course, neither of them knew that seeing her would be his dying wish.
Carly thought putting together her dad’s favorite movie snack would ease her pain. She thought that by coming to the theater she’d get some kind of closure. But as she looked around the empty lobby, she couldn’t help but feel complete and utter rage.
If he hadn’t moved to this cookie-cutter small town to pursue his half-baked dream, Bruce would still be alive. If he and her mother hadn’t had their first date in a movie theater, maybe none of this would’ve happened in the first place. Why were both of her parents gone from this world when so many other people got to keep theirs for longer?
The bucket shook in Carly’s unsteady hands. Being here without him was too excruciating. For the first time since arriving in Julian, she finally understood her dad was reallygone. Her throat burned. She couldn’t breathe. The hot, bubbling sorrow that had built inside her blow by blow finally tumbled out as a scream. She clenched her jaw, hurled the bucket of candy as hard as she could and it exploded against a framed poster.
Carly let out a loud sob. The flood of tears was so intense that the tightness in her throat couldn’t compete with the force of her own pain. Her body swayed from the grief, and she collapsed to the floor. Her dad, that clever, sweet bear of a man, was gone.
