Page 87 of Deja Who
FORTY-FOUR
“And they lived happily ever after. Except I don’t think so.”
They were on Archer’s porch, swaying back and forth on the porch swing. Leah had been unaware such things existed in the twenty-first century. It was nightfall of a long day.
“You promised to forgive me for being horrible to you in order to save you,” she scolded. “You can’t tell me you knew I didn’t mean it and then decide perhaps I did mean it.”
He had been bringing her hand to his mouth to nibble on her knuckles, but snorted against them instead. “That’s not what I’m talking about, okay? I was talking to Cat about what you said—”
Leah groaned. The mayor had had choice words for them both. Some of the words had been “idiots” and “dumbasses” and “thank God, you’re all right” and “cripes, the shit I put up with” and “you swear you’re both okay” and then a lot more in the “idiots” vein followed by “they don’t have any carrots here!”.
Cat had, in fact, called the police, careful to have them take her statement at the hotel as Catherine Carey. The three agreed that the cops taking her statement in the park might cause unnecessary complications. (“Wait, ma’am,whatdid you say your old job was?”)
The police had plenty of questions for Archer and Leah, mostly because the two of them were involved, once again, in a violent death. The second that week, in fact. So... yeah.
Fortunately, the police seemed satisfied with the answers. It helped that they had Nellie Nazir’s killer, complete with the de rigueur creepy killer motive. And Tom’s shrine to Leah had been found almost immediately, which made sense because it was basically his entire house.
When asked how she’d known him most of her life but never saw his house, Leah’s reply was particularly Leah-ish: “I made it clear to the late Tom Winn of Winner’s TalentTM(ugh) that I would rather be hooked up to an IV of my own vomit than ever set foot in his home. And my mother would never deign to visit; she made him come to her. Always. So, yes: I knew that man my entire life and never saw his home.”
Archer’s cab driver was found and questioned, and confirmed Archer was the hysterical young man who kept begging him to call the cops “before he kills her again oh myGodwhen will this horrible wonderful month be over?” Leah’s cab driver also came forward, but more to explain to the police (who already knew) what a help she had been to those in need and if she killed anyone she had a damned good reason and why don’t the cops leave Leah alone and go after actual criminals. Huh? Huh?
“Anyway, Cat knew what you’d done—that you’d pulled aHarry and the Hendersons—”
Leah groaned again.
“—but you have to admit, you made a couple of good points. We might be too different. I’m not sure I’m the right guy for you.”
“Don’t break up with me for my own good, Archer,” she warned. “It’s annoying and condescending.”
“Can’t break up with you,” he said, not looking at her. He was still nibbling on her knuckles, so she stayed where she was, content to have any part of him touch any part of her. “We haven’t been going out.”
“Well, we are now. We are now officially going out. This is our official first date.”
“On the porch? We didn’t have dinner. We didn’t even have ice cream. And we both smell like a police station.”
“Official first date. And come out and say it, for heaven’s sake. You think being life-blind will be a problem for me.”
“Won’t it?”
She yowled in frustration, then had to smile when he jumped. She leaned forward, her arm across the back of the swing, and thumped him on the chest with her other hand, well away from his stab wounds. “I don’t have a problem with your life-blind status. I decided it makes you far more attractive to me than the alternative, and I told that to all the girls in my cell.”
“Uh. What? Is this gonna be aChained Heatthing? Please let it be aChained Heatthing.”
“I refuse to be distracted by yet another silly movie reference. Look at me. Listen to me. Of course you fear going forward from here; anyone who isn’t severely mentally damaged would be. And that ismy fault, for saying those dreadful awful things. I swear to you, I swear it, the only one of the two of us who has a problem with being life-blind is you. And also, you’re not.”
“Sure, now. Today.” She could see Archer, her proud, vibrant, endlessly amusing and charming Archer, was having trouble keeping his head up, having trouble looking her in the eyes.My fault. This is my fault and I’d better fix it or I’ll wish Tom had killed me.“But eventually you’ll get tired of living with someone who’s missing a bunch of their parts.”
“You’re not missing anything!” she almost howled. “Except knowing when to quit being an idiot!” She took a steadying breath. “Sorry. And did you not hear what I said? You aren’t life-blind.”
“I love your love talk. Um. What?”
“You’re not life-blind. You’rerasa. You’ve done all this before. Just like the rest of us, you’ve had baggage to clear in order to move on. The difference is,youeventually got it right.”
He shook his head. “Leah, you don’t have to make up some fairy tale aboutrasato make me feel—”
“It’s not a fairy tale. It’s just, we’re all so jaded, so far from ourselves, we told ourselves it was. It’s not. You did it. Other people did it. Other peoplecando it. I was top in my field when I was jaded and passively waiting to be murdered. Think how many people I can help, not that I’m not either of those things. Because of you, Archer.”
“And you.”
