Page 100 of Keepsake
“Lark,” Griff growled. “Calm down, honey.”
“I…can’t,” I gasped, my teeth chattering together. “Griff, I t-tried. But I can’t do it anymore. I’m so t-tired.”
“Shh. I got you.”
Things went fuzzy then, like a camera’s lens knocked out of focus. I felt my body begin to shake, and I heard a rushing sound in my ears. The walls tilted unpredictably.
Strong arms caught me. “Get my phone and my keys,” a gruff voice ordered. “Put on some shoes, then go outside and pull my truck around.”
I didn’t want to hear any of it. Everything was mayhem, and I’d had all I could take. So I squeezed my eyes shut, closing myself off to the voices, and I pushed my consciousness into a tiny place, even smaller than a shack in the desert. I pinched my whole self tightly together, folding my soul like a flimsy scarf, until there was barely anything left.
My last conscious thought was of Oscar’s stricken face.
And then nothing.
29
Zach
Idozed, my body tipped forward against the hospital bed, my head propped in the crook of one arm. My free hand held Lark’s. I’d tried to doze and listen for her at the same time. But I’d been here and mostly awake since three a.m., so the sleeping won out.
That’s why it took me a minute to discover when Lark awoke. Her hand jerked from mine, and valuable seconds were lost as I struggled to pull myself from the depths of sleep.
“No,” she whispered, and the sound brought me fully awake. But Lark wasn’t dreaming. She was looking around the hospital room in dismay. And then her face crumpled.
I was on my feet and leaning over the bed the next second. I pulled her in, kissing her forehead. “It’s okay,” I said. “You’re okay.”
“I’ve really fucked up now,” she whispered. Her shoulders began to shake. “Griffin… And you… My parents are going to kill me.”
“They got here an hour ago,” I said as calmly as I could.
“This isn’t supposed to be me,” Lark rasped. “I’m not really like this.”
“I know, sweetie.”
She surprised me then, by putting one hand in the center of my chest and giving a sharp push. “You should get as far away from me as you can. Just fuckingrun—” A sob cut off the sentence. “Look where we are right now! Why are you even here with me?”
I pulled her into my lap, my arms caging her in. She relaxed immediately, resting her forehead against my collarbone. “Zach, I’m so sorry.”
“I know.”
“When I said… Before… That was mean. And not true.”
“Shh. It’s not the time to worry about that.” I cradled her head, which lolled against my shoulder. The doctor had told me the sedatives they’d given her were pretty strong.
“It’s just that I couldn’t be what you want me to be.”
I took a deep breath in through my nose. “I get that now. It’s okay. I still have you as a friend, right? I don’t have too many of those.” I tried, but it was hard to keep my voice from sounding raw. The very person I needed to be strong for was the one who could make me fall to pieces.
“I’m a wreck.”
“I noticed.” I rocked her against my chest. “I’ve been a wreck, too. It doesn’t last forever.” I held on tight. It was hard to shake the notion that if I just held her indefinitely, everything would be okay. It was naive, though. I was ready to admit that she needed more help.
Though everything seemed steadier whenever I could feel her heartbeat. And I knew I was good for her, because I felt her body relax against mine.
Iwasgood for her. I was. But my love wasn’t enough to cure the problem, no matter how much I wished it was.
The door opened, and her parents walked in.
