Page 57 of Goodbye Paradise
“Sure,” Daniel said. “But she feels like a failure.”
Josh sighed. “Poor Maggie. That’s just not fair.”
“I know,” Daniel said. “And I still feel like a tool for yelling at her. I should have known it wasn’t her fault. And here you sat all day with the baby. Can I take her?” he held out his hands.
Josh looked down at the sleeping pink person. “I think I should just put her in the crib. You’ll get your chance in about three hours, I think?” He stood up.
“Thank you,” Daniel said, as Josh headed for the stairs.
“I don’t mind at all,” he said, climbing the stairs slowly.
When he’d truly disappeared, I echoed Josh. “He doesn’t mind, you know. It gives him a way to be useful.”
Daniel rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Useful doesn’t even begin to describe it. I was such a dick this morning. And you two have really saved our butts lately.”
“But we eat a lot.”
“I’m still coming out ahead,” Daniel said, standing up. “I’d better go to bed. She’ll wake up hungry before I know it. Is there baby milk in the freezer, or am I switching to that powdered formula…?”
“Ask Josh,” I said. “He’s the one who knows.”
Daniel gave a sad little smile. “At least somebody does. Night.”
Half an hour later, I got into bed with Josh. He didn’t shun me anymore these days. When I rolled toward him, he came into my arms willingly. “I bet you’re beat,” I said.
“Why?”
“You held that baby for, like, an entire day.”
“She only weighs eight pounds. And I’m not the one who is going to wake up in the night to feed her.” He was quiet for a minute. “I like Chloe. We understand each other.”
Somehow, I avoided laughing. And even if I had chuckled, it wouldn’t be because I thought what Josh said was ridiculous. It’s just that he was so freaking cute. “She’s lucky to have you,” I said. “And so are Maggie and Daniel. You might have saved her, Josh. I’m not kidding.”
“That’s awfully dark.”
I pushed a hand through his soft hair. “I don’t mean to be dramatic. But you saw something wrong, and you got her help. Maybe Daniel would have done that eventually. But it was pretty amazing, and he was grateful.”
“I hope the medicine works.”
“It will. And they’ll always remember it. You’re in good, now.” I meant that last bit as a joke. But it was really quite true.
“I guess,” he said.
I hugged him tighter. “Youguess?Of course you are.”
“They don’t know about us.”
“Oh.” That was true. And, if I was honest, not a day went by that I didn’t worry about what it would mean if they knew. I wavered between thinking that it might not matter and the certainty that it totally would. “Maybe someday we can tell them. After they’ve known us a long time.”
“Don’t do it,” Josh said quickly.
I hugged him again. “I would never say a word without your permission. Don’t worry. I know you like it here.”
“Yeah.”
“Eventually they’re gonna wonder, though. If it’s ten years from now, and we’ve been sharing a house, or whatever, and neither of us has a wife.”
“Ugh. They won’t wonder for a long time, though. They won’t expect us to marry anyone for years.”
