Page 78 of Goodbye Paradise
“Yeah.”
“Someonehita pregnant eighteen-year-old girl?”
“I don’t, uh, know the story. I don’t know if Maggie knows it yet, either. But I just wanted to tell you so you could keep your cool.”
“Jesus fucking Christ.” Caleb put the heels of both hands to his forehead. Then he walked around me and into the house.
In the kitchen, Maggie stopped me with an update on the meal we were making together. (Teaching Caleb to cook hadn’t gotten any further than scrambled eggs and toast. So she’d turned her attentions to me, probably so that her child would not starve during the work day.) So I actually missed the moment when Caleb greeted Miriam. I heard her give a little shriek when he walked into the room. But I didn’t see his reaction. I only heard the rumble of his voice, low and reassuring.
It’s going to be fine, I told myself.
But when dinnertime came, Caleb seemed withdrawn, barely speaking. After the meal, he sat in a chair in the living room with Maggie and Miriam.
When Chloe was asked who she wanted to read her a bedtime story, she said “Bosh.” So I spent an hour getting her ready for bed, and down for the night. Putting Chloe to bed was always Maggie or Daniel’s job, but today was weird in every possible way.
When I came back downstairs, I couldn’t find anyone in the living room. But there were female voices coming from Miriam’s new room (which was my old one.) Daniel and Caleb were missing. I decided that they’d gone over to discuss something in the apartment. So I headed for the back hall and my shoes.
I nearly tripped over Caleb, who was standing outside our old room, eavesdropping.
My mouth flew open to say something, but Caleb raised an angry finger to his lips.
I didn’t know what to make of that. But I didn’t want to spy. (Knowing me, I’d probably be caught, anyway.) So I continued to the mud room, put on my shoes, and let myself out the door.
The workshop and apartment were completely dark. I flipped on the entryway lights and went up to our new space. The sheets Maggie had bought were sitting just inside the door.
Alone, I put the new mattress pad on the new mattress, then made the bed. Maggie had provided us with an old quilt that was large enough for a king-sized bed, and Caleb had bought a blanket.
The bed was ready, but I was still alone.
I brushed my teeth and got ready for bed, with Caleb still missing. I was reading my library book when the door finally opened. But Caleb did not call out a greeting.
Moments later, heavy footsteps thudded on the loft stairs we’d built. Caleb walked around the bed to his side and got in, his back to me.
King-sized beds are large. There were three feet of space between us.
I shut off the light. “Caleb,” I asked. “Are you okay?”
“No,” he said.
“Can we talk about it?”
“No.”
There was really nowhere I could go with that. So I didn’t push.
It took me a long time to fall asleep, though. This really wasn’t how I pictured our first night together in the apartment. I rolled to face his back, eying his strong shoulders, willing him to turn to me.
But he never did.
Twenty-Four
THE NEXT MORNINGSHOULD have felt ordinary. I milked cows. I joined Maggie and Chloe in the kitchen for breakfast.
Caleb left for work while I was still in the barn. That wasn’t unusual. It’s just that he hadn’t spoken to me at all since yesterday.
“I’m taking Miriam to the doctor later this morning,” Maggie said, stirring her coffee.
“Is something wrong?”
