Page 8 of Goodbye Paradise
Still, I stepped closer, trying to keep the fear off my face. “Good morning,” I said.
Four grim faces were silent in return. That’s when I knew. That’s when I was sure that Caleb was right.
Elder Michael pointed at the door to the tool shed, which confused me for a moment. Were we going through with the charade of performing another inventory?
I went to open it, turning the knob.
Locked. So…?
My forehead bounced off the wooden door then, stunning me. Someone grabbed me by the ankles, which meant I was going down hard.
Bus station…!My chest hit the ground, my forehead bouncing once on the gravel surface.
“Get his hands,” someone grunted. I recognized the voice as belonging to my step-father, Seth.
My own family was helping to throw me away.
My head throbbed anew, and my heart quaked. On the ground, I tasted dirt, and as my arms were roughly yanked back, I felt my bowels loosen with fear.
Butno. I wasnotgoing to totally lose it. Because Ezra would enjoy that too much. And I didn’t want to make this fun for him.
Many hands lifted me up, then rolled me onto the bed of the Tundra. I heard the clang of the tailgate.
“You know what to do,” Elder Michael said.
“Yessir,” said Ezra’s voice and another one that I did not catch. Two truck doors opened and shut. And then we began to roll.
Bus station. Bus station. Bus station.
Bus station. Bus station.
Bus station.
* * *
Six hours later, I wasn’t chanting anymore.
The bumpy ride toward Casper had seemed to last forever. Bouncing around the dirty metal truck, it might have been twenty minutes, or twice that long.
At last we rolled to a stop. I could hear cars going by on a nearby road. The tailgate was suddenly jerked away, and Ezra’s face appeared in mine.
He started the conversation by slapping my face. “You little faggot. Don’t you dare come back. And don’t even think about going to the police. They’ll only lock you up for stealing a gun.”
But I didn’t steal it. I did not say this out loud, because I knew he didn’t care.
Ezra snaked a hand toward my body, and I flinched. But he was only jamming something in the back pocket of my Carhartts. “Use this to get on a bus,” he said. “There’s a homeless shelter in Cheyenne.”
I said nothing. I just watched his lips move. Because I was trying to get over the idea that they were going to leave me by the side of the road. This road, which I did not recognize.
The thing was, part of me always knew I’d be one of the boys who disappeared. Iknew. It’s just that a little piece of me always hoped that it wouldn’t turn out this way.
“Do I make myself clear?” Ezra demanded.
Swallowing every bit of my stinking pride, I whispered, “Yessir.”
He reached into his jeans and took out a knife, at which point my heart nearly failed again. But he only used it to slice the tape that was tying my hands.
“Out,” he said, grabbing me by the arms. Since my feet were still taped together, I went down like a sack of potatoes, landing on my ass in the dirt.
