Page 94 of Goodbye Paradise
I kissed him on the forehead. “I know. The good news is that Miriam might get a chance to send him to jail. I looked it up on the internet. You can prosecute a rape in Wyoming no matter how long ago it was. So she can settle in here for years before she decides whether to tell the police what happened.”
Josh groaned. “That poor girl. She’ll probably be too afraid to ever set foot there again.”
“Mmm,” I pulled him closer to me. “I didn’t tell you this to make you feel bad. But itisbad.”
“Yeah,” he sighed. “At least I understand now why you flipped.” He wiggled closer to me. “I’m glad Miriam got away from him.”
“Me too.”
“You’re a gentle soul, Caleb.”
“Not as gentle as you,” I whispered. And that was the truth.
Another half hour went by, both of us lost in our thoughts.
“I could just lie here all day.” Josh’s words were muffled by the pillow.
It made my heart swell to hear that. He hadn’t kicked me out of bed. “That works for me. But eventually, we’ll need groceries.”
Josh flopped onto his back. “Yeah. We have to feed ourselves now.”
“Not totally. Maggie said we should still have dinner with them every night.” I reached over a put a hand on his belly. Today I planned to touch Josh any chance I got. I wasn’t even going to let him out of my sight.
I cuddled closer to him, while we both listened to the silence. “Please forgive me,” I whispered eventually.
The short pause before he spoke almost gutted me. “I need you to love me, even when things get hard.” he said.
“I do, though. Always. I’m going to prove it to you.”
The only question was how.
Eventually, we got up and showered together.
“Let’s go to the store,” I said afterward. “We’ll get food for our new fridge.”
Josh smiled, grabbing his coat. “Okay. We should ask Maggie if there’s anything she needs, though.”
“Good idea.”
A few minutes later, though, I felt a little nervous walking into the house. Surely my reputation had suffered since last night. When I’d told Daniel my plan to marry Miriam, he’d told me I was crazy. And that wasbeforehe’d had to drive Josh out at midnight to pick up my drunk ass.
And then there was Miriam. We used to be close. But in the forty-eight hours she’d been here, I’d barely spoken ten words to her, because I was busy freaking out.
Today was Saturday, and well after the milking, so the whole family was sitting in the living room, drinking coffee. Maggie had some classical guitar music playing on the stereo. She and Daniel sat on the couch, each with a section of the newspaper. And Miriam sat in the rocking chair, with Chloe on her lap.
Josh stopped in the doorway, and I drew up beside him. In a maneuver that I would have never considered before, I put an affectionate hand on the back of Josh’s neck. In front of God and everyone. “Hi,” I said softly, as they all looked up.
“Hi,” Daniel said carefully, letting his newspaper fall into his lap. “How are you this morning?”
I cleared my throat. “Saner, I think.”
Daniel grinned, as did Miriam. She looked up to the place where I’d rested my hand on Josh’s skin, and her smile grew.
For a moment I just stared at Miriam. The bruises on her face had faded almost to nothing. She was beautiful, and so, so young. Impossibly young.
“I need to…” the words got stuck in my throat. Because I’d just spent two days trying to figure out what it was that I really did need to do. Marrying Miriam was not the answer. But it left me with little else than a few words. “I need to apologize to Miriam. Can I do that?”
Miriam’s smile faded. “Don’t, Caleb. What happened to me isn’t your fault.”
