Page 95 of Goodbye Paradise
“It is, though.” My voice was rough, and I wondered if I could do this without it breaking. “The day I left, I should have taken you with me. The three of us…”
She shook her head. “You tried, sweetie. You told me I could put on my coat and go.”
Everyone looked at me then, their faces inquisitive.
Had I really said that to her? I thought back to our frantic conversation in the pantry of Miriam’s family house. At any moment, we might have been discovered. There was barely any time to say goodbye, let alone plot another escape.
Ihadtold her she could come, though. I’d said those words. But there had been a catch. “I didn’t… I didn’tpush, Miriam. Because I was worried about Josh, and I knew I was running out of time. It was almost meaner to throw it out there that way. I didn’t give you even an hour to think about it.”
She shook her head. “Doesn’t matter. You said to put on my coat and meet you at the main gate. And for a second, I was ready to do it. But then I made a different decision. My father was ill, and I was worried about my mother. I stood there andchose, Caleb. I didn’t want to leave them.”
“He was ill?” She hadn’t told me that.
She nodded. “He died a little while after you left. Mom is remarried to Elder Michael. But Michael is out of favor now. So Mom and I both ended up in unfortunate situations. She’s the one who told me to run away last week. She gave me Maggie’s phone number, and all her kitchen money. And she sent me away.”
“I’m still sorry,” I said, my voice rough.
Her eyes were filling, but she smiled anyway. “I know, Caleb. Me too. But it’s going to be okay. You don’t have to worry about me anymore.”
“I want to help, though.” My voice finally broke on the last word, and so Josh slipped an arm onto my back.
“You will,” she said, a single tear rolling down her cheek. “You can help me in so many ways. I’m just across the yard.”
Blowing out a breath, I felt my shoulders relax for the first time in two days.
I needed a minute to compose myself, which Josh seemed to sense. So he changed the subject. “We were heading to the grocery store, actually. Our new fridge is empty. Do you guys need anything?”
Maggie stood up. “Go after lunch. I have two quiches in the oven. I’ll make you a shopping list while they cool.”
“Someday you’ll have to stop feeding us, Maggie,” I said.
“I don’t see why,” she returned. “It’s a few eggs and some flour, big guy. Get over yourself.”
I was trying. Really I was.
“We’ll need more coffee,” Daniel said, following Maggie out of the room. “I’m putting it on the grocery list. If you’re really willing to make a trip to that zoo on a Saturday, I’ll take you up on it.”
“Deal,” I promised.
“Down,” Chloe said suddenly.
Miriam helped the little girl slide off the chair. She toddled over to us. “Bosh,” she said, raising her arms. “Up.”
My partner bent over immediately and lifted her into his arms. “Hi there,” he whispered. “You miss me?”
“Baba.”
“Yeah?” He lifted her a little higher and smelled her backside. I recognized that as one of those childcare maneuvers that separated the naturals from those who were just phoning it in. “Let’s take care of this diaper first. And then we’ll find you some milk.” He headed up the stairs with Chloe in his arms.
I watched him go, admiring him until the backs of his long legs disappeared upstairs.
When I turned around again, Miriam was smiling at me. “Cute.”
My cheeks heated. “Yeah, he is.”
She giggled. “I meant you, silly. Come and talk to me.” She got up and took her sister’s place on the couch.
I sat down beside her, and she kicked her stocking feet into my lap. Sitting here like this was forbidden on the Compound. Because the path to hell was paved with friends touching each other’s feet.
