Page 43 of Man Hands
“Good afternoon!” he says, clapping his hands. “How can I help you fine gentlemen? Are you shopping for an engagement ring today?” He directs this question atBraht.
“Not me. Him.” Braht points at me, and Iscowl.
“But…” The salesman’s chiseled face frowns in confusion. “I sold you a ring in the winter. Two-carat, round-cut center stone, with a halo setting adding a half-carat totalweight!”
“That one was returned,” I say through aclenchedjaw.
“Oh, honey,” he says softly. “I’msorry.”
“It’s fine,” I snap. “I have bad luck with women. My mother cursed me, I think.” That extra bit just popped out, damn it. I’m probably jinxing my fake marriage by mentioning my motherrightnow.
Wait, can you jinx a fake marriage? I guess it doesn’tmatter.
“Women aren’t the only choice, honey,” Maynard says. “Maybe you’re supporting the wrong team.” He gives Braht the side eye. “You and your friend here would be hottogether.”
Braht doubles over withlaughter.
“Not really,” I tell Maynard over the howls of snort-laughter. “He’s doing a vegetarian master cleanse. That gives you really stinky farts. It’s all that driedfruit.”
“Oh,” Maynard says slowly. “What ashame.”
“I know.” I clear my throat. “Can we just get this over with? I need a ring. Not the same setting aslasttime.”
“No! Of course not,” Maynard agrees. “How about a solitaire for this go-round? Emerald-cut,perhaps.”
“I was thinking a bezel setting,” Braht says. “Platinum, of course. Don’t show us any stone with a color rating below D, and S-rangeclarity.”
“Naturally,” Maynardagrees.
I justgrunt.
Maynard grabs a set of keys large enough to break into Fort Knox and disappears into thebackroom.
“This is gonna be awesome,” Braht says, rubbing his hands together. “Bling makes the world goround.”
“No it doesn’t,” Iargue.
“It’s anexpression.”
“No it isn’t.” I should have gotten fake-engaged to Braht, because we already argue like an old marriedcouple.
Luckily, Maynard comes back quickly. He sets a gorgeous velvet box on the glass counter. Then he puts one hand over the box and takes a deep, cleansing breath. “This is a very special diamond, men. Prepare to be dazzled.” I kinda want to choke himalready.
But then he opens the box, and Iamdazzled. It’s really glitzy, this rock. The setting allows the expensive jewelry-store lighting to shine right through the stone, so the ring appears to burst with color even though it’s made from the whitest platinum and the iciest gem I’veeverseen.
It’s gorgeous. Absolutelyperfect.
I hate everythingaboutit.
Braht kicks me in the ankle, which is another reason we could never be a couple. “What’s the matter? It’s agreatring.”
“Yeah. Thegreatest.”
“So throw down the thirty grand, and let’s roll. We could tee off in—” He checks his Rolex. “Twentyminutes.”
I’m still staring at the ring. He isn’t wrong. The simple setting means it’s tasteful in spite of its size. But I can’t look at this ring and not think about the last one I bought. Chandra’s ring was flashier, because she’s like Braht—she likes bling. It was a fuckingrock. I’d wanted to make sure the TV viewers could see it clearly when we were on screen together. I’d really splurged on thatsucker.
And it wasn’tenough.
