Page 60 of Man Hands
“I’m telling you, Tom, if you don’t agree to this, then they’re going to lose patience. You get that, right? You’ve had this show forever, and there is new blood out there, and I don’t like to be the bearer of bad news, but timing matters. The network needs your help on this. This is your chance to remind them you belong on thatnetwork.”
Who am I kidding? Of course I’m going to do the special. I don’t want to give up my career just because the network is being prudish. And if it’s a success, this might help out Brynn. Her fake fiancé’s career comeback could help hersalongtoo.
And anyway—what else am I going to do? Stay here in Michigan? Hide away in my big empty house? Dream up a cozy little cottage? Ask Brynn to move inwithme?
Now there’s a ridiculous idea. She wouldn’t want me for keeps. Sure the sex is great, but she doesn’t know the real me. It’s not like I’m relationship material. I’m just a man with big hands and a…hammer.
Fuck it. I need this distraction. And even if I don’t sign on for season ten, I can walk away from it all with my headheldhigh.
Even better—maybe the whole “special” thing could take the spotlight off Brynn so she can get on withherlife.
That’s the thing that pushes me todecide.
“When do we start?”Iask.
34Brazilian Cheese Puffs Can Fix Everything ExceptHeartache
Brynn
After we returnfrom New York, I get busy planning my future. I don’t have a color-coded weekly planner like Ash does, but that doesn’t matter. I send out another batch of résumés, and I research how to legally change my name. I’m going to give the job search three months, and if it doesn’t work, drastic measures will becalledfor.
And then?Iwait.
Waitingsucks.
Alot.
But I refuse to become a basket case. So I reward myself for this burst of productivity in two ways. First, I find a recipe for pão de queijo. It calls for tapioca flour, and because that’s a carb—and because I’m me—I have somealready.
Second, I prop up my tablet on the kitchen counter and stream another episode ofMr. Fixit Quickwhile I work on the cheese-puff dough. In this one, Tom is renovating a barn in Montana. It’s a big job to convert it into a house, but the red structure is adorable. I’m ready to relocate to Montana the moment Tom installs a set of sliding glass doors which open up the home to mountainviews.
But then there’s a plot twist. And I’m notready.
Tom is building a deck, which means I get to watch him use a nail gun. The flex of his biceps on each nail makes me a little crazy. There I am in my happy place, stirring cheese into dough and watching my favorite guynail things(rawr!), when he decides he needs to admire the view, just to make sure they’ve set up the deckcorrectly.
“Quality control,” he says to the camera with asmile.
There’s a time lapse of the sun beginning to set and glow orange. Tom stands at the deck railing, facing that gorgeous sunset. And that’s when Chandra the decorator carries two glasses of champagne onto the deck, handing one tomyman.
And then? She snuggles up to his side and he puts his arm around her,pulling hercloser.
I let out a little shriek of dismay. Of course the camera lingers on them—two gorgeous people together in a gorgeous place. But I can’t take it. I need to stop the video. My hands are sticky with butter and dough, so I lean over and touch pause with my nose. Asonedoes.
Fucking Chandra. No, really. He isfuckingChandra?She’shisex?
Seriously?
My happy place is less happy than it was a few minutes ago, in spite of being coated with butter and cheese. I plop balls of dough onto a cookie sheet, trying to decide what this means. He’s never said Chandra’s name before. But you don’t snuggle your coworker unless you’re sleepingwithher.
Who am I kidding? He probably sleeps with hordes of women. A gorgeous man working in television could pick up a different girl at every Home Depot inAmerica.
And why do I caresomuch?
When the cheese puffs are in the oven, and the timer is set, I wash my hands and check the video again, in case my hormones got the best of me, and the scene isn’t exactly as I’d firstthought.
Nope. When I rewind, it actually gets worse. Because this time I’m ready, and I get a good look at the macho way he tucks her into his side. I swear he did the same thing with me just two nights ago, as we walked up SeventhAvenue.
And I freakinglovedit.
