Page 33 of Bountiful
“Hmm?” I looked up quickly. That’s when I noticed we were sitting in front of the cabinalready.
The dashboard GPS picked that moment to announce, “You have arrived at your destination!” And its mechanical voice soundedaccusatory.
Leo had shut off the engine, but he hadn’t gotten out of the car yet. He was watching me carefully. “What can I do for you?” he askedquietly.
“Nothing,” I croaked. “I just need…” The sentence died on my lips. I just needed…what, exactly? To rewind my life to the point where I hadn’t fucked up? “An hour ago, my contract negotiation was the biggest thing on my mind. Now I have a problem that moneycan’tfix.”
“I suppose not,” Leo said, leaning back in the driver’s seat. “Did she ask formoney?”
I shook my head. “I’d pay it, though. That’s really not theproblem.”
“Right.” Leo reached across the gearshift and squeezed my shoulder. “Let’s go inside. You can call yoursister.”
“Oh, fuck. I’m not ready.” Bess was going to flip her lid. And usually I was such a trouble-freeclient.
Leo laughed. “Fine. You said you went grocery shopping. Got some sandwichstuff?”
“Yeah.”
“Great. I’ll make you a sandwich while you strategize what you’re going to say to Bess. Did she know about Zara?” He opened his door andgotout.
“No,” I grunted, unclipping my seat belt. I got out of the car and took yet another deep breath. But it didn’t quell the panic. “There was nothing to tell. We had a lot of sex and went ourseparateways.”
Or I thought we had. But Zara had spent the last two yearswithmy…
Panic rolled through me again. I hadn’teverbeen this flattened. Not even when the doctor had said that I had to sit out the Stanley Cup finals lastmonth.
We went inside. I took a couple more deep, yogabreaths.
True to his word, Leo puttered around the cabin’s kitchen, whistling to himself and rooting around in the fridge. “Wow, Beri—you weren’t fooling around at the store. I don’t even know what to pick. Turkey and swisssoundgood?”
“Sure.”
“Mayo?Tomato?”
“Thanks, rookie,” Igrunted.
He set several items on the counter and then stopped to study me. “I know you’re freaking. But it’s going to be okay. If it’s true that you have a child,you’lldeal.”
“I can’t be somebody’s daddy.” The word would hardly form in my mouth. I sat down heavily on a barstool.
“Why not? I mean, nobody is demanding that you marry her and carve the Thanksgiving turkeyeveryyear.”
The ridiculous image made me let out a bark of laughter. “Can youimagine?”
Leo made a point to survey all the food I’d purchased and then organized in our shared kitchen. “Thing is, I can. You play the lone-wolf role pretty well, but I’m not sure I buy itonyou.”
Jesus. The kid was being nice to me, but I wasn’t in the mood for his theories. Buying groceries had nothing to do with raising afamily.
“Now, if Zara isn’t the girl for you, there’s no reason to pretend she is. The child won’t care if you’re married, so long as you show your face sometimes. You know you can’t leave your kid hanging inthewind.”
I groaned, because that was the whole problem. I’d spent my entire life hanging in the wind. Whatever a decent father was supposed to look like, I had never had one. “My dad was the biggest asshole on the planet, Leo. Showing my face? I don’t even know how to do that. At a bare minimum I’d need one of those yellow how-to books.Fatherhood for Assholes, orwhatever.”
“For Dummies, you mean? Because that’s what you are. A dummy. Not anasshole.”
“I’m so flattered,” I said in my best assholevoice.
The rookie rolled his eyes. Then he pushed a plate toward me with a well-made sandwich on it. “You’re allowed your freak attack, Beri. Today, at least. But tomorrow you gotta strap on the padsanddeal.”
