Page 37 of Man Cuffed
She tilts her head and scrutinizes me. “Hey, are you all right? You look a little flushed.”
Of course I do. When she gets close to me, my brain stops working. I really like Meg, but I still can’t be the kind of guy she’s looking for. I can’t date her, because I don’t do that. And we can’t sleep together because I have a feeling it wouldn’t be just a one-time deal with her, and that’s a bad idea.
“Okay, I’ll help you,” I say, because I need to extract myself from this conversation. She smells like apples and I just want to bury my face in her bosom.
“You will?” She lets out another ear-piercing shriek. “See? You are still the best neighbor ever.”
And then I get another goddamn hug. I can feel her breasts press against my chest. “Congratulations, Trouble,” I say, easing back, and trying again to focus. “Does this mean you’re going to be on TV?”
She shrugs. “Not yet. In fact, probably not. For a decade I’ve had these tiny breakthroughs that seem like something big is about to happen. And then it never does. This will probably be exactly the same story. That’s why I have to celebrate right now. Before I’m disappointed again.” She grabs her pocketbook off the bed. “I’m still going out to lunch. I know just the place.”
Most of me wants to ask where. But I don’t. Because it’s none of my business.
“We’ll talk research later,” she says, leaving the bedroom. I follow her into the living room, where she’s stepping into her shoes. “Maybe on the deck one night this week? I’ll bring a notebook and interrogate you.”
“I’m the cop. I do the interrogating,” I say as a reflex.
She turns to me. “Where else do you like to be in charge?”
“Um…” Just the gleam in her eye makes my blood thicken. Oh hey, libido! Nice of you to drop by again. Fuck my life.
Meg just beams at me. “Speechless, much? It’s a good thing you’re not the one auditioning for a cop show.” She opens her apartment door and shoos me outside into the hallway. “Bye, Copper! We’ll talk soon!”
“Bye, Trouble,” I mutter, watching her go.
It isn’t until she disappears into the elevator that I realize I have a problem. Since I broke into Meg’s apartment via the deck, my front door is locked. And I can’t climb back over the fence because Meg is gone.
I let out a groan. “How much trouble can one woman make in my life?” I ask the hallway.
Plenty, obviously.
10Pasty vs. Pasties
Meg
“And how’s my little Meggers?” my father asks, grinning at me from his corner of our four-way family video chat.
“Pretty good!” I reply. And it’s true. Dad’s ridiculous nicknames usually grate on me. But today I’m too happy to care.
“Hey, watch the hair!” my sister yelps from her corner, where she’s holding little baby Alfred at her boob while the twins literally climb on her. I love my nieces and nephew, but when I see them crawling over her like puppies, I’m really grateful that I am nowhere near that phase of my life.
Eventually, I’d like to do the Mom Thing, but not today.
First, I’d like to do the Fall In Love For Real Thing.
And I’d also like to do the Get My Life Together Thing. These chats with my family are pretty good at reminding me that I’m supposed to have priorities.
“So…” My sister pries Alfred’s tiny fingers off her hair. “You’re pumped up about this audition?” Sadie asks. “Is this really a big break? You said it could be. But sometimes you…”
“Exaggerate?” I ask.
“Let’s just say you’ve always had natural acting instincts,” my mother chimes in.
This is why I don’t spend more time chatting about my professional life with my parents. “This is the first time I’ve been so close to a real TV role. But you know what’s weird? I ought to be spasming between hope and anxiety right now. But I feel kind of blasé about it. I don’t know if that’s maturity or if I’m finally just numb.”
There’s a silence while my parents consider this. Dad bites his lip, and Mom wrinkles up her nose.
“Acting is a hard road, Meg,” my sister says, stroking the feathery hair on her baby’s head as he nurses. “Numbness wouldn’t be unfounded.” My sister totally sounds like a therapist. Which makes sense, because she is actually a therapist.
