Page 59 of Man Cuffed
Gaping, Julie transfers his weight to me. And then the baby is perched on my arm, looking up at me. He lets out a squawk, but then goes suddenly quiet. Like he’s figured out that I don’t have the right haircut or maybe the right clothes. I don’t smell like his dad, probably. Not enough whiskey on my breath.
Okay, maybe that last thing isn’t fair. My mother tells me Morris has finally got his shit together. At least some of it. And I hope it’s true, if only for the sake of the fifteen-pound person who’s peering at me like he’s seen a ghost.
I clear my throat. “A few of the details are wrong, aren’t they little guy?” And then I wish I’d kept my trap shut, because the words echo back inside my chest.The details are wrong. Julie obviously doesn’t agree. She made her choice.
Now she looks at her hands, growing visibly more uncomfortable. A few more details start to sink in, too. Her hair is mussed, but not in a sexy way. It’s unkempt. That just doesn’t look like the Julie I know. Then again, I’m not sure I ever really knew her. “You okay?” I ask. “Can I assume your call to the station was about that party?”
“Oh, I’m fine!” she breathes. “I mean, can you believe how loud they are? That kid’s parents are gone to Mackinac for the weekend, and they left him unsupervised and he’s throwing a rager. Can you get them to quiet it down a little? The baby won’t go to sleep. I haven’t been able to watch the ending ofThe Bachelorand it’s killing me. Every time I press play, the dialogue is totally drowned out by the twerps next door.”
It’s a whole lot of verbal diarrhea. And it just keeps on rolling.
“Morris is in Chicago. Business trip. Again,” she says. Thatagainis weighted, but I’m not taking the bait.
“Okay.” The music thumps on into the silence between us. “My, uh, partner is going to shut ‘em down next door.” And that’s when I run out of things to say. I look down at the baby, who’s still gazing at me, puzzlement on his rounded features. “You have a good night, now. Don’t keep mommy up.”
“Bah,” he says gravely. Then he drools a little.
“So…” I wait for Julie to come unstuck.
She blinks and then grabs him back. She looks like she wants to say more, but I’m not here to talk her down or ask her aboutThe Bachelor, for chrissakes. I glance over at the neighbor’s place, where Lance is currently scaring the shit out of some teenage kids. They’re actually pouring out of windows, trying to escape.
Sometimes the uniform is enough. This is one of those times.
I turn back to Julie. I’ve got nothing more to do here. I just need to fill out the paperwork and take Meg home. Not with me, of course, although that sounds nice.
Then I feel Julie’s soft hand on my arm. “It’s good to see you,” she says. “Weird, but good. How long has it been?”
“Let’s not,” I say abruptly. “Let’s not do this. My shift is over. It’s late.”
She swallows hard and runs a hand through her hair. Next door, the music shuts off abruptly, like a needle ripped off a record. That’s how Julie and I ended, too. One ugly day the music stopped and there was nothing left to do but pick up the overturned red plastic cups of my youth and carry on.
“I’m going off shift,” I say, trying to figure out how to get off this porch. Lance should rescue me. Where is that guy?
“Okay,” Julie says, and then sighs. “You could come inside and have a drink with your old sister-in-law. I don’t bite.”
“No thanks,” I say quickly. Because that’s the worst idea I’ve ever heard. “And I have to get this back to the station.” I motion to my squad car.
Julie looks past me. “Oh! You’ve got a criminal in there?”
My reaction is immediate and visceral. Meg is sitting in the front seat, her bright eyes watching me. There’s nothing remotely criminal about Meg, except for how hot she is.
“Are you kidding me right now? That’s not a criminal. That’s mygirlfriend. Why would you assume that? Is it because of her skin color?” Funny how the wordgirlfriendcomes out smooth and easy. Maybe it’s because I’m mad.
“Oh, god.” Julie puts a hand up to her cheek. “I’m sooooo sorry. What a stupid assumption I made!”
The baby lets out a squawk of agreement. I like this kid already.
“She’s waiting for me,” I say through gritted teeth.
“In your squad car? She’s a cop?”
“No, she’s a drama queen. Gotta go.” I turn and hop off the stoop.Smooth, Maguire. Oh well. I never was smooth with Julie. Never could be. Everything about this night is stressful.
And now I know what my child would have looked like if I had had one with Julie.
I turn my back on the house where Morris and Julie live. It’s like visiting a version of my life that could have been. An alternate universe. I walk toward what my life is now. My job...and Meg. Or just my job. And an apartment where there aren’t any baby toys strewn around.
So I got that going for me. It’s something.
