Page 21 of Lies and Lullabies
“Well… twice. But one night.”
He laughed. “You still didn’t answer the question.”
“I thought big brothers didn’t want to hear that stuff.”
“You’re not sixteen. And there’s a serious lack of men in both our lives, Kiki. Just tell me one hot thing about him.”
“I can’t,” I whispered. “I can’t pick one thing. Because everything about that man is hot.”
Adam collapsed onto the deck with an exaggerated groan. “Wow.”
Even if I wasn’t willing to talk about it, I still thought about that night all the time. It had been hot, but also sweet. After John and I had made love the first time, we’d held each other for hours.
Strangely, it hadn’t been the least bit awkward. We lay in the same comfortable silence we’d often enjoyed, only without clothes. Occasionally he’d kissed my cheek, or stroked my hip. He was a hands-on guy, and I had the vague idea that he’d been nearly as starved for affection as I’d been.
He held me in silence until eventually saying: “If you end up getting together with your high-school sweetheart, I hope he realizes how lucky he is.”
“Do you think I’ll have to tell him about my… terrible night a year ago?” I’d asked.
That’s when his hand went still on my back. “He doesn’tknow?”
I shook my head. “It didn’t seem like the kind of news you email. Also, I didn’t want to distract him. It’s dangerous over there.”
“Well, yeah. You have to tell him. He needs to understand that you might still get scared. Some little thing he does could trigger your fear. What if he gets a little rough, thinking that’s fun for both of you?”
I raised my head to look at him. “Like what? Show me.”
He gave a nervous chuckle. “No way.”
Propping myself on an elbow, I looked him in the eye. “Why?”
When he looked back at me, it was with an expression that I couldn’t read. “Someday I hope you can have deliciously rough sex without a second thought. If you feel like it. But not tonight, and not from me.”
“You don’t like it that way?” I asked.
“I thought I did. Right now I barely remember my own name.” He gave me a sexy grin. “God, Kira, you look… triumphant.”
“Do I? That’s because I am.”
“That’s because you conquered me, and had your way with me.” His silly smile reappeared, and we both laughed.
And—Lord—he was so attractive, stretched out naked beside me. Like a work of art. High on my own bravery, I allowed myself to brazenly admire his body while I still had the chance.
The intensity of my gaze must have been contagious, because his grin faded, too. He rolled closer to me, propping himself on an elbow, dropping his head to kiss me.
The kiss was another scorcher. I opened my mouth and took him in. Before too long, he was on top of me, and I found myself shifting my hips around with pleasure. “Oh,” I gasped. “You feel good up there.”
“I really do,” he panted. “Is this okay?” He bore down with his hips.
God, yes. I could only moan my approval. He worked his mouth down my jaw and onto my neck. I let my hands wander the beautiful muscles on his chest until I felt myself flood with desire all over again. It was as if he’d flipped a switch, and it couldn’t be shut off again.
“Look at me, sweetness.” I raised my eyes to his serious ones. “Before this gets too far, tell me what not to do up here. I don’t want to walk into any tripwires, if I can help it.”
I cupped my hands on that chiseled, movie-star chin. “Don’t worry. As long as you don’t sneak up on me from behind and smash my face into a dumpster, we’ll probably be fine.”
His face slackened with dismay. Without another word, he pivoted, collapsing onto the bed by my side. His arms wrapped around me. “Please tell me this guy got put away for a really long time.”
“He did. You’re shaking.”
