Page 11 of Steadfast
I’d let him get away with that behavior because I hadn’t wanted to acknowledge that side of Jude. And I’d been so thrilled that someone as exciting as him could love me that I looked the other way. I hadn’t wanted my father to be right, either. My father hated my boyfriend because my father was good at hating.
My convictions had been firm and unwavering.
Then, one clear night in May, Jude offered my brother a ride somewhere. The newspaper reporter was unable to discover where. Apparently Jude was so high that night he couldn’t remember the crash. A tox screen found enough opiates in his bloodstream to stop an ox.
Jude’s car hit a tree on the side of the two-lane road where they traveled. My brother flew from the car and snapped his neck. He wasn’t wearing a seatbelt, but we’re not supposed to dwell on that. Instead, my parents focused only on the fact that Jude had a drug problem. Everyone wanted to know how I could have been so stupid as to date a man who’d drive while intoxicated.
Three years later and I was still trying to figure that out.
“You look like you could use a burger and a beer,” Denny said. He’d pulled into a spot in the town lot, and now was watching me from the driver’s seat.
“I really could. This has been a hell of a week.”
His face got soft. “I’m sorry. Maybe this was a bad idea.”
“No,” I said a little too forcefully. “You are a force of good in the world, Den. Seriously.”
I’d never seen Denny’s face light up quite so brightly as it did then. He hopped out of the car and ran around to my side, and I let him open the door for me. “Hey, Denny?” I asked, climbing out.
“Yeah?”
He was standing right in front of me, which made it easier to say what I needed to say. “I want to thank you for herding me in the right direction yesterday.” When I said this, his face took on a strange, intense expression. (Later I would kick myself for misinterpreting this.) “When I needed your help yesterday, you—”
My apology was cut off by an unexpected kiss. Unexpected and very wet. Wet the way acar washis wet.
Holy…!
My instinct to flee kicked in just a wee bit too hard. Instead of gently pushing Denny back, I jerked away from him, slipping between his body and the side of the car. Only when I’d put some distance between us did my manners reemerge. “Sorry,” I gasped. “I…”
“Jesus Christ,” he said, putting his head in his hands. “I’msorry. I thought you were saying…” He took a deep breath. “I’m such an idiot.”
Whathadhe thought I meant?
“You were thanking me for herding you to themeeting,” he said, his voice strained. “Not herding you to go out with me.”
“Yes of course…” And wasn’tthisembarrassing?
“Wow,” he said, staring at his shoes. “I’ve screwed up dates before. But it usually takes me a couple of hours.”
I was too embarrassed for him to agree. I’d been worried that I’d have to give him the brush-off after tonight, but I thought it would wait at least until the weekend. Now a long silence hung between us. I had no idea what to do.
“I’ll take you home,” he said, pulling his keys out of his pocket. He still hadn’t looked at me again.
As much as I wished I could zap myself home to my bedroom with a book and a cup of tea, it would only make tomorrow more awkward. I saw Denny every day at work. I even saw him on Wednesday nights at church. “Bowling,” I said.
“You don’t have to do that,” he said. “Really. I get it. I’m sorry.”
“Come on,” I said, ducking around him and heading down the sidewalk. “We’re going to skip the tavern, but that means we can have some of those greasy wings at the bowling alley.”
“You like greasy wings?” he asked, with something like relief in his voice.
“Sometimes they hit the spot.” I kept going, heading toward the bowling alley.
A moment later, I heard him following me.
Sophie and Jude are both 17
Sophie and Jude never go to each other’s houses.
