Page 56 of Good as Gold
And Matteo is a lifelong friend. What if we have the most awkward sex in the history of sex?
I give a little shiver of horror, and then I hear my phone ping. I trot over to the sofa and pick it up.
Matteo
I’m in. I want to do this for you.
Oh my heart. It’s fluttering again.
In the interest of full disclosure, I also want to do you.
Now a different part of me flutters.
So when is it showtime?
I check the date, and do a little math.
Leila:
Probably Saturday. Hopefully you’re not planning a weekend away.
Matteo
Saturday is the Vermont Taste Fest. I’ll be taking the beer wagon on its maiden voyage. But that’s over at six.
Leila:
Okay, cool.
I slap my forehead.Okay, cool?I sound like we’re planning a trip to the grocery store. Then again, I’ve never planned a meetup for sex before. With anyone. I don’t know the rules.
If there’s a special etiquette for arranging your own impregnation, none of the fertility books I’m reading have covered that yet.
My hands are sweating on my phone, and Matteo seems to be done with the conversation. I tuck my phone into my pocket and locate my wallet and keys. I’ve got to get out of this apartment for a little while. My nerves need exercise.
I head out—skipping the bar, where I’d probably just stare awkwardly at Matteo—and drive up the hill, through the cute center of town, and onto the commercial strip that follows. My destination is Walgreens. I have some business to take care of.
In the reproductive-health aisle, I take my time reading the packages for every brand of ovulation test. They all seem the same, and they all promise superior accuracy, so I choose a package of ten ovulation kits and also one pregnancy test.
Why not be prepared, right? Good vibes and all that.
In the front of the store, I add a pack of gum to my basket. Wait—I also need some breath mints. I haven’t kissed anyone new since the Obama administration.
Hold on. Will there be kissing? I’d just assumed. But maybe that’s too personal. How would I know how modern hookups work? But you never know…
I add an extra tin of breath mints to my basket, just in case.
I make my way to the self-checkout. “START SCANNING NOW!” the machine yells at me.
“Calm down,” I whisper under my breath. I scan the mints and the gum and toss them into a bag. And then the ovulation kits…
“Leila?”
My chin snaps up. “Rory?” Holy cow. He’s standing right in front of me. Practically in my face.
“Hey, uh, glad I caught you.” He clears his throat. “I have a question. What is that special kind of soap the washer needs?”
“H-E!” I practically shout. “That stands for high efficiency.”Just please, please don’t look at the last item in my basket.
