Page 108 of Holidating
But I’d made Andy’s lips twitch too with my crude description of what had happened. He was trying not to laugh now, but sometimes holding it back only makes it worse.
“Go on,” I told him. “We might as well laugh about it. It’s either that or crying.”
He let a chuckle escape. “You want me to punch him for you? I’ve never won a fight in my life, but this seems like a good cause.”
“Well, okay,” I teased. “So long as you think a trip to jail is a good use of the rest of your night.”
He grinned. “With my luck, it would be a trip to the hospital, andthena trip to jail. But seriously, I have two sisters. The thought of someone doing that to you makes me want to deck him.”
“That’s really…” I swallowed hard. “Thank you. I needed to hear someone say that. I’ve spent the week telling myself, ‘hey, it’s just sex, right? No big deal.’ But I’m embarrassed. And it’s not the same as if we were fooling around and somebody walked in by accident.”
“Ofcourseit’s not the same. Intentions are everything.” As he said this, I saw him shiver.
“Come on,” I said suddenly. Here I’d been struggling to find a reason to go back inside the house, but there was a perfectly good one standing right in front of me. I opened the door. “You’re goingto freeze, and catch pneumonia, and miss our art history exam. And then I won’t have anyone friendly to sit next to. So we’re going back in.”
“If you’re ready,” he said.
“I’m as ready as I’ll ever be.” I took Andy’s cold hand in mine and pulled him inside. There was nobody in the parlor anymore. Keeping hold of Andy’s hand, I tugged him through the room and into the big old sunroom.
In front of us rose a giant Christmas tree with about a million white lights on it. And now I understood why the girls put the tree in here. Those lights reflected in the many windowpanes circling the room. Lifting my chin, I gazed up at it, unblinking. I’d done this ever since I was a child — I’d stare at the lit Christmas tree until my vision went slightly askew and the lights blurred before my eyes. The tree was even more beautiful when you didn’t focus on each pinprick of light, but saw the whole thing at once.
“Nice,” Andy whispered beside me. “The kids at your party tomorrow will love it.”
“I hope so. Otherwise those three cases of our beer that the Betas drank went to waste.”
My date snorted, and I squeezed his hand a little tighter.
Of course, I couldn’t stare at the tree forever. Or cling to Andy. Eventually, I had to look around, and even make eye contact. And it wasn’t going to get any easier if I put it off.
The brave thing to do would be to just say hello to Dash and his stupid friends, as if nothing had happened. They’d forget about the little show I’d put on eventually, right?
Gah. Okay. Deep breaths.
“Let’s get you another drink,” I suggested. “I know I could use one.” Still clutching Andy’s hand like a security blanket, I steered the two of us over to a table against the wall. I had to let him go to pop the tops off of two bottles of Moosehead Lager.
“I like this beer,” Andy said, taking his. “Thanks.”
I took a swig of mine. Maybe a beer or ten was the right way to go. Tonight I couldn’t exactly get wasted to dull the pain. And not because I’d worry that Andy would take advantage of me. It was just the opposite — poor Andy already had already shored me up oncetonight. He didn’t need the trouble of escorting a drunk girl home, even if I did feel like getting numb.
Now, at close range, I heard a familiar chuckle.
Steeling myself, I turned. And there he was, a beer in hand, grinning at his pledge brothers. Dash’s eyes slid in my direction. They seemed to lock on me for a nanosecond, then jump to Andy. Then, just as quickly, they slid away.
Okay, that wasn’t so bad. I was just about to exhale when the guy beside Dash elbowed him, a knowing smirk on his face. Lowering his beefy head to Dash’s ear, he said something which made my ex-boyfriend grin.
My pulse kicked up, and I felt hot all over. Maybe I couldn’t do this after all. Maybe I should duck out of a party for the first time in myentire freaking life, and then transfer to another college. On another continent.
That sounded like a plan.
Turning my back, I squeezed past Andy and out through the door we’d come in not five minutes ago. I trotted across the parlor, skidding to a stop in front of the fireplace. Meanwhile, my heart bounded along inside my chest like a cartoon rabbit.
“Shit,” I whispered to myself.
I heard footsteps, and a few seconds later Andy appeared at my elbow. “Forget something?” he teased. But I saw worry in his face.
Looking down into the fireplace embers, I tried to think. “They’re probably laughing at me right now.”
“They’re not,” he said. “I overheard them talking about hockey, actually.”
