Page 111 of Peregrine's Call
“Tav, you have to say you don’t love me.”
“What?”
“I need to hear you say that youdon’tlove me. It’s the only way I can have a future, so that I can start from nothing, knowing that my love for you never had a chance and there’s no hope for us.”
“I can’t do that,” he said.
She froze, uncertainty vibrating in her whole body. He felt it, and felt it seep into his own being. He was at a point when a dozen possible futures awaited him, and everything hinged on what he did next.
Tav reached out, his arms circling her waist, drawing her against his body. He ran one hand up her back and to her head, cradling her close. “I can’t tell you I don’t love you, Robin, because I do. I never meant to fall in love with you, and it probably doesn’t matter when I did. But I love you now, and I will keep loving you, whether I’m with you or not.”
He told her he loved her in every language he knew, including the language that had no words, just the touch of his hands to hers, promising that he’d always be there for her, no matter where they went in the world. Robin raised her head and he captured her mouth, a deep but tender kiss that promised even more.
* * * *
Hearing Octavian tell her he loved her was like summer returning. Robin sighed, resting her head on his shoulder. “I love you so much,” she whispered. “Only you.”
He kissed her hair and held her even closer.
“Since I first saw you,” she went on, dreamily, “I realized how much of the world I had yet to see. I want to see it with you.”
“The world is a very large place,” he said at last.
“I want to see the whole of creation, but I’m content to begin where you lead me.”
“You think we ought to travel together?” he asked, a new look in his eyes.
“Dear Lord, Tav. That’s what I’ve been saying!”
“If you want to travel with me, and stay with me, and sleep and eat with me, then you’d have to marry me. That’s the only condition I’d accept.”
“Of course I want to marry you!” she said. Only days ago, she’d been cursing the very notion of marriage. But a marriage to Tav was an entirely different matter. “Do you think we could get married tomorrow?”
His hands closed around her shoulders to keep her grounded. “Wait. It’s not quite so simple, Robin. We’re not marrying without permission from your family. And there are several reasons why they might refuse to give it.”
“Name one! You’re a knight. You’re one of Alric’s closest friends. You’ve saved his life. You’ve saved my life! Cecily adores you. Rainald thinks you’re wonderful. I think you’re wonderful.” Robin was aware that her list of reasons in favor of a marriage wasn’t quite typical, but what did it matter? She loved Tav and Tav loved her.
“I’m a knight, and I serve at the pleasure of my lord, and I have no lands or income of my own. Lord de Vere sought to marry you to a man of a much higher rank than I’ll ever have. He may like me well enough as a man, but not as a match for his chosen daughter.”
She bit her lip. Would Rainald really oppose Tav’s request to marry her? “We have to try,” she whispered. “Let’s go now and find him. I’ll go mad if we have to wait until tomorrow to even know what he says.”
Tav nodded, then pulled her close and claimed her mouth in a rough kiss. She responded in kind, her need for him suddenly turning her wild.
“If he says no, I’m stealing you,” Tav said, his voice low in her ear, thrilling her. She believed him and loved him even more.
The sky turned to night by then, and it was barely possible no one noticed their behavior at the top of the walls. Certainly, the Octavian who descended the steps was the man people expected to see—calm, collected, unfailingly attentive to Robin, who walked beside him.
“Where is Lord Rainald?” Robin asked of the maid who greeted her when they entered the manor house.
“In his chamber, I believe.”
Robin nodded, and they went up to find him. Robin began to shake a little, and Tav cupped her elbow to steady her.
“Ah! My sweet Robin,” Rainald said when she knocked on the door. “And Octavian. Come in, come in. A busy day, was it not? But soon the odious Lord Pierce will be gone from Cleobury, and we’ll have peace again.” He turned to Tav. “You must come back as soon as you’re able. I did not care for Lord Drugo snatching you away so quickly.”
“About that,” Robin said. “We wanted to speak to you, my lord.”
“Then sit with me and speak. My goodness, such serious expressions on your faces.”
