Page 62 of A Fearless Heart
“Doing what? Lounging around London instead of taking responsibility for Calderwood, leaving it all to you? Doesn’t he know about your attacks?”
“Of course he does! He’s asked doctor after doctor about it for me, trying to find someone who can explain my condition. They all say I’m just a hysterical woman. Isn’tthathelpful?”
“If you went to London yourself and saw the doctors, maybe you’d get a better answer.”
“If I could go to London myself, it would mean that I wasn’t suffering from whatever is keeping me locked up here!”
“Cady, please. If you let yourself get too emotional, it might trigger another attack.”
“Don’t you think I know that!” Cady already sensed the dizziness coming on, the iron bands tightening around her ribs. She dragged in a breath, telling herself to calm down, knowing that it wouldn’t help.
Then Gabe was embracing her, his arms also going around her like iron bands, but not painful. He held her close to him, one hand on her head, his lips pressing against her forehead. “Forget everything I said, Cady. Just breathe. In and out. Don’t worry about anything else. We’ll figure that out later. Just breathe for me.”
She wanted nothing more than to breathe, even the big gulping breaths that felt like drowning. Gabe didn’t let go, and just repeated simple orders to breathe in, out, in, out until the dizziness passed and she calmed, averting the oncoming attack. For now.
“You can let me go now,” she said. “I won’t collapse on you.”
He stepped back and held her at arm’s length, surveying her with concern. “You’re sure? Can I get you something?”
“Water would be nice.”
He poured some from the pitcher on a side table, and Cady drank it gratefully. Her limbs still felt oddly heavy, and she was a bit sick to her stomach. But that was far, far better than an attack.
“Now what?” she asked. “You’re going to leave here for London, aren’t you? You’ll find Trevor no matter what I say, and then you’ll keep pursuing this killer until you find him.”
“That’s the plan,” he told her. “But it doesn’t feel right to leave you.”
“I was alone here before.” She shrugged, trying to hide the extent of her disappointment. In a very short time, she’d come to expect Gabe nearby.
Then he said, “Why don’t you come to London with me?”
She looked up, trying to see the joke. “You know I can’t.”
“What if you could?” he asked, his eyes intent. “When was the last time you tried to leave the estate?”
“Just after Papa died. I had an attack in the carriage before we’d even passed through the gates.”
“But you haven’t tried since?”
“I came up with reasons why I couldn’t. And the locals helped, with their gossip. It felt safer to stay.”
“What if we went together, you and I? I’d be with you the whole journey.”
Cady sat back, nibbling her lip, considering. Her heart was fluttering at the thought, but perhaps it wasn’t from fear. “I don’t know.”
“You could see Trevor.”
She inhaled. “That would be…I’d like that very much.” Being separated from her brother was the single worst aspect of her life of the past few years, even worse than the panic and the loneliness.
“You can bring Oscar along. I can arrange a place for you to stay, somewhere safe, in a good neighborhood. And I’ll be close by, so you don’t feel abandoned.”
“Oh, no!”
“Cady, please hear me out!”
“No, I mean I have a place to stay,” she said to clarify. “We own a house in town. Though it’s been years since I’ve been there, Trevor tells me he checks in and makes sure it’s all kept up.”
Gabe frowned. “He doesn’t live there?”
