Page 49 of To Crave Madly
He was definitely about to kiss me. I was sure he wanted to kiss me and now… Now he was getting married to another woman. I felt dirty. Like I had sinned, and this was my fault. Shame crawled its ugly fingers along my skin and took hold of my stomach sickeningly. The contents of my breakfast churned in my stomach as I looked between the two of them as they exchanged pleasantries.
How could I have been so stupid? I knew Fenris only wanted to be friends. Other than just now he’d never really shown any interest in me romantically. He was my movie buddy, my popcorn maker and the guy whose hugs made me feel like I was in the safest place in the world.
Ah, shit. I’d totally fallen for a guy who wasn’t free to fall for me. What a fucking idiot I was. And now I got to work with his fiancée in one-to-one sessions. How the fuck was I supposed to survive that?
“Why don’t you show me to your room? I’d love to settle in.” She beamed up at him and my heart sank further. She clearly loved him, and it made me feel like the worst person ever.
Fenris glanced over at me, sorrow and regret flickering in his gaze before he returned his own warm smile down at his fiancée. “Of course. I am sure you would like to relax after your journey here and Lori will be looking forward to your lessons tomorrow.”
She scowled playfully up at him. “Don’t call them lessons.” She turned her bright green eyes towards me. “That makes it sound so dreary, doesn’t it? We are going to have an exploration into what makes your magic tick. It will probably be a touch explosive, so I’d come comfortably dressed.”
I couldn’t even find the strength to make my mouth form words so I just nodded.
Her smile faltered a little. “I’ll see you tomorrow then?”
Again, I nodded. I was so close to collapsing in a heap of ugly crying that I was struggling to hold it together after this gut-punching revelation from Fenris.
I watched them leave, arm in arm, and let the door close behind them before I finally let out the sob I’d been fighting to hide back. I sank to the floor and wrapped my arms around my knees in an attempt to curb my little self-pity party. It didn’t help. How could I have been so stupid to think that a guy like Fenris would be free to like me? He was so lovely and kind, and warm, and… Another sob wrenched itself from my throat as my heart splintered silently in my chest.
Stupid.
Stupid woman. Letting my heart get carried away before my head had caught up. I’d fallen for him and I’d fallen hard. Blood started to pound in my ears as the anger started to mount. This wasn’t my fault. I hadn’t imagined it. I wasn’t crazy. There was definitely something there… andhewas the one who failed to mention he was getting married.
Well, fuck him, the wanker.
I jumped to my feet and walked over to the weapons cupboard, grabbing a set of throwing knives. Throwing sharp and pointy objects at a board while imaging Fenris’ face might make me feel a bit better.
I launched the first one and caught the edge of the board. That was disappointing. I was usually better than that. Urgh, maybe I was too angry and upset for this, but I launched the remaining knives anyway. The last one did hit dead centre and I did a little fist pump in the air.
“How you managed to hit that centre mark, I will never know.”
I yelped at the sudden voice that came from the dark corner by the door. Alec stood there casually leaning against the wall with his arms folded and his bright amber eyes glistening in the darkness.
“Sweet Jesus, Alec. If I had a knife in my hand, I’d have thrown it at you.”
As he stepped towards me, I could see his shoulders shaking as he laughed at my girly little scream. My heart was still racing, and I couldn’t quite catch my breath.
“Yes, but you would have missed so I am not too worried.”
Cheeky fucker. “Hey! You don’t know that.”
Alec scoffed. “With a stance like that, it’s lucky you hit anything. Your form is all over the place and you're clearly pissed off. Ergo my comment, you would have totally missed me.”
Damn him for being right. “Well, if you’re such an expert at it, why don’t you show me how it’s done?”
“Gladly.” He strode towards the board and collected the knives. I suddenly regretted my decision to let him help me. The way he held those knives and walked towards me, a mocking glint blazing in those bright eyes of his, made him look lethal, dangerous and sexy. Like he would do bad things to me and I’d enjoy every second of it. His lips curled into a wicked smirk as if he knew exactly what I was thinking.
He stopped a few inches from me and tucked the tip of a blade under my chin. The metal was cold and smooth, and the sharp tip kissed my skin with a mere whisper. He wasn’t threatening me, but he still had my blood rushing around my system as he tipped my chin up with the edge of the blade. He rolled his bottom lip between his teeth and my body responded with a zing of desire all the way down to my core. I had a sudden need to take his bottom lip between my teeth and put my own mark there.
“Lori,” he whispered huskily, desire burning in his eyes as he stared down at me.
My core throbbed in demand for attention. “Yes?”
He leaned closer. Oh, god. Oh, yes. Kiss me.
“Your shoelaces are untied.”
Wait. What?
