Page 21 of Lily In The Valley
“You don’t think helping people in this community has a purpose?”
I clenched my jaw. “Daddy, you’re twisting my words.”
“Kenny, wait,” my mother said, stepping in. “Stop antagonizing her. She just got the biggest news of her life, and you’re ruining it with guilt.”
“I’m not guilting her, I’m asking her to consider the people who raised her!” His voice boomed through the living room.
“And I’m telling you to respect her decisions like the grown woman she is,” my mother snapped back.
I stood, sensing where this was headed.
My mother’s voice softened. “Kelly”
“No, I’m not doing this with y’all.” I grabbed my bag. “Y’all love to turn any moment into a back-and-forth about you. It’s like you feed on the drama. I’m tired of it.” I peered into my father’s eyes. “Daddy, I came to make sure you were good, not defend my career.”
He looked away from me, arms crossed, jaw set.
My mother let out a slow sigh, rubbing her forehead.
“I’m proud of you, baby,” she said as I made my way to the front door.
“Thanks,” I threw behind me, clipped.
I heard a rustle, followed by, “I mean it.”
I nodded but kept moving. Tears pressed behind my eyes, threatening to break through. I wouldn’t give my father the satisfaction of knowing he’d gotten to me. My mother followed behind me. We stood in the circle driveway of their home, the sun fading behind the horizon, a warm breeze cutting through the awkward silence between us.
My mother cradled my face. “He’s just scared, Kelly.”
“No he’s not. He’s just used to things revolving around him.”
She gave a short laugh, rubbing her forehead again. “Yeah. But you know him. He loves hard, even though it comes out crooked.”
“Is that what you’ve been telling yourself all these years?” I sighed. “I shouldn’t have to keep explaining myself to him. I worked hard for this. But unless it’s his way, he won’t hear any of it.”
“Oh, baby.” She ran her hands up and down the sides of my arms as she looked up at me with tenderness in her eyes. “You’re not wrong, but where do you think you learned it?”
I frowned. “Excuse me?”
“You walk around just as proud, expecting everyone to be okay with your choices and boundaries without extending that same grace.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said, staring off to the side.
“So you didn’t set up Nessa and Zay, even though you knew she wasn’t ready to see him again.”
I smacked my lips. “And now they’re getting married and having a baby. Your point?”
“What do you mean a baby?” My mother shook her head, wanting to stay focused. “Marriage and a baby aside, what if it didn’t end up that way. You busy yourself poking into everyone else’s business, when you need to be paying attention to your own.”
“My business isn’t for anyone else,” I said, crossing my arms.
She scoffed, placing her hands on her hips. “You think we don’t know something’s going on between you and Khalil? I knew you been feeling him since I caught that look on your face the last time we were in New Orleans. When your Uncle PJ almost pulled a gun on your daddy again.”
“What do you mean again?”
“Listen to me, Kelly,” she urged, grabbing my chin. “I see myself in you. Hiding your feelings. Telling everybody I was ‘fine’ while breaking apart inside.”
I looked away, knowing everything she said was true.
