Page 47 of Sparks of Insanity
I don’t even want to know why they have another house like this, but hey, maybe my dads are preppers expecting the apocalypse. With them, literally anything’s possible.
“Em, the pizzas are ready,” Ethan called from the kitchen, having tossed a few pre-made pizzas in the oven for us, so we could get some rest after. I’d changed into a t-shirt andsweatpants I’d found in the room I’d moved into. There were drawers full of them, and they just about fit me, if I rolled up the pant-legs. Again, I have no idea why they’re here, but it’s one of many things I’ll probably never ask.
We sat down to eat like civilised people, and started off with an awkward silence, but Ethan decided to break it with a charming subject.
“Uh… Em…”
I lifted my eyes from my plate, mouth full of pizza.
“Mmm?”
“Are you uh… are you sore after what I uh…” Oh. He meant down there. I shook my head, then hesitated and shrugged a little. It was a little tender, but not painful.
“I’m sorry,” he said quietly, pushing his plate away, half a slice still sitting there.
“Can you stop saying that now? I get it, what I asked of you was a real asshole thing, and you hate yourself for doing it, but I don’t hate you. I needed to do it, and you did what I asked, even though you didn’t want to.”
Ethan sighed, wrapping his hands around his coffee mug, staring at the dark liquid instead of at me.
“You really don’t get it, do you?”
“Get what?”
He tapped his fingers on the side of the mug.
“I did want to. I do. I still want to. I’m a fucking monster, because I want you naked again, and I want to be inside you. I want to cum inside you again, because I like the idea of my cum in you.” Should I tell him I’m not on birth control, or is it pointless at this point? I knew girls could get pregnant their first time, so it was probably already too late.
“Was it… I mean, if you put aside the whole emotional mindfuck part of it, was it… was it good?”
I pushed aside my empty plate and waited for his response, wondering what answer could possibly be acceptable in this situation.
“Was it good? Was fucking you good? Was being balls deep inside you good? Was feeling your virginal barrier breaking the hottest thing in the world? I don’t know what answer you want here, but I fucking…yeah, it was good. Better than good, even though I feel like I should hate myself.”
How long would he torture himself over this?
“Ethan, if I don’t hate you, I don’t see what right you have to do so. It wasmyvirginity and I’m glad it’s gone, and more than that, I’m glad it was you. What if it had been one of those assholes when I was a kid? What if I’d gone through that at the body of a teenager who couldn’t control himself any better than you did? At least I got to be with the man I wanted inside me.”
Ethan sipped his coffee. “We need to talk sleeping arrangements.” I nodded, because I’d been thinking about this.
“I’m sharing with you,” I said, right as he spoke.
“We should sleep separately.”What?
“No. What? Why?”
Ethan picked up the plates and took them to the kitchen, and I followed.
“Ethan?”
He slammed a plate down and glared at me over his shoulder.
“I just fucking told you why. Did you not listen to a single thing I just said? I want to do it again, dammit. I want you naked again, I want to be inside you again. Hell, I even want to hold you down as I fuck you, so you just have to take it, instead of being some sassy little thing, and trying to control things. I warned you that I was a monster, but you all think you know me better than I do. I know what I’ve lost of my soul, but I don’t know if you realise just how little is left of the old me. Your dads were right. I’m a predator. A threat to your safety. The only people dumberthan you for trusting me, are your dads, for giving us this chance. You know how much damage I could do to you in a week? A night?”
He advanced on me, trapping me with my butt pressed against the kitchen counter, his arms either side of me.
“You’re so vulnerable, Em. So small, and fragile, and breakable. I’m strong enough to force you into anything I want. I could push you down to your knees, and forcibly fuck your mouth and throat, and you’d have to take it. I could bend you over this counter, and fuck you hard, no matter how you struggle, because I’ll always be stronger.” His body pressed against mine, and I felt the ridge of his hard cock in his trousers.
He wanted these things, and he wanted them now. My heart thudded in my chest, and panic started to rise. If he wanted these things, I had no escape from him. He’d make me do it.
