Page 66 of Sparks of Insanity
He truly believed that evil and cruelty were justified, if they resulted in love. If he was so sure, was he right?
“And if it doesn’t win him over?”
Dad looked at me then, resting a hand on my shoulder, that familiar look of wonder lightening the expression on his face for a moment. They still seemed in awe of my new ability to be touched. Ethan had crashed through those barriers, and they hadn’t built back up after him. Maybe I could be a little bit of who I used to be, because clearly some of the destruction in my soul could be fixed after all.
“If it doesn’t work, Em, then he’s not worthy of you. You deserve a man who’ll understand your complex needs, and support you no matter what. He’ll overlook the worst of you, because he knows he’s also getting your best. Your good points as well as the bad. Nobody is inherently good, not even Ethan. He learned that the hard way, but he’ll come around. If… if he’s the right one.”
Wow. Maybe my dads were smarter than I realised. They certainly had a clear understanding of people, and that nobody was either all good or all bad. We all had a bit of both in us. Maybe that was okay.
“You know what, dad? I will go with you. Can you wait while I go and get changed?” Dad’s face creased with a big smile and he nodded.
“Sure. I’ll grab some water for us, and wait outside.”
Running with dad wasn’t as bad as I’d expected, because it did help to clear my head a bit, and the fresh air definitely seemed to rejuvenate me, but the whole time we were out, I felt like someone was watching me. It was the creepiest sensation, like a prickly feeling on the back of my neck.
Try as I might, I just couldn’t find the source of my uneasiness, so I figured I was just imagining things.
Ethan
SHE LOOKED HOT IN those leggings and that vest, running with her dad, all lithe and elegant. The park they chose to run in was perfect, because there was plenty of tree cover around the outskirts, so I simply kept to the shadows and watched her. I imagined snatching her from the path, and several times, I had to physically fight the urge to do it, even though I knew it was a dangerous move with her dad so close.
I’d survived so far, purely because I’d tried to end things myself, and they’d got her back. Whether they’d ever let me get close again was another matter, but I’d watch and follow her until I had my moment.
I’d spent the last three weeks thinking about her. At first it was about trying not to, and then when I couldn’t put her out of my head, it was about hating her. Over that time though, that hate turned to need. No, not need. It was more visceral than that. I had to have possession of her. Own her. Force her to bend tomyfucking will this time.
I had to win. That was it. I had to take control of this thing between us, and make it what I fucking want it to be. No more letting her push me into stuff, no more letting her control what happens. I’d decided I’d take her, keep her, and fucking own her. She wouldn’t get to breathe without my permission. Destroy me? Payback is going to be a fucking bitch, Ember. I’m coming for you,little saboteur. I’ll show you destruction.
I spent the next week watching her at home, and on any little jaunts out. Her runs with her dad were becoming a habit, so I followed them every time, even the one occasion that Gray joined them too. It was risky as fuck, but more important was keeping an eye on my possession.
Nothing could happen to her until she became mine, and that would happen any day now. I’d become laser focused on her, on her whereabouts, on her wellbeing, even though I planned to decimate it once I had control of her.
My chance came on a Sunday afternoon, when her family decided to venture out almost altogether. Almost, as in Ember stayed behind, for whatever reason, and that was all I needed.
I gave them half an hour to make sure they weren’t going to turn back, and then I made my move. I’d become accustomed to sneaking into places, so I parked ‘my’ car down the lane behind her home, and removed the section of fencing that I’d carefully loosened, so I could make my way into her garden. She almost caught me, because she was in the garden, but I knew how to fix that, so I dug out my burner phone and called her house’s landline, watching her sigh heavily, closing herKindle, and getting up to go inside.
As I’d hoped, she left the back door open as she ran inside, and I waited just inside the kitchen, behind the door to the hallway. When the call rang off, because you know, I didn’t actually want to talk to her, she came stomping back through the door into thekitchen, and that’s when I grabbed her, a fistful of hair in one hand, and my other hand firmly over her mouth.
She struggled and kicked out at me for several seconds, before she suddenly stilled. She tried to say something from behind my hand, but even though it was mumbled, I knew what it was. My name. She knew it was me, maybe she was even just hoping it was me.
“Were you waiting for me, baby? I’m here to take you home with me.” She tensed, her whole body like a rock for a moment, then she jabbed her elbow back, trying to fight me off. It hurt, I’ll admit, but not as much as losing everything I’d ever cared about.
I pulled hard on her hair in retaliation, and she yelped, again muffled by my hand.
“Here’s what’s going to happen. You’re going to walk outside with me, out to the fence, and through that to my car. You’ll behave, and come quietly, or I’ll just knock you out and drag you there. I’m easy on which. Either way, you have no other choices here.”
I grabbed her phone as I started to lead her outside, that grip in her hair keeping her under my control, but I’d had to release her mouth.
“Utter a fucking sound, and I’ll silence you, Ember.”
She tensed at my words, but I had a feeling it was my use of her name, rather than the fact that I’d threatened her, that did it. Her name was a weapon I could use against her, when I needed to break her concentration, or diminish her confidence, and I’d use it as often as I fucking had to.
Nearly dying, at my own hand, no less, had made a lot of things really fucking clear to me. The old me was gone for good. He died that night, and I’m what rose in his place. From the fucking ashes. A monstrous version of me, without the morals or remorse the former me had struggled with.
It was incredibly freeing, and peaceful, to literally not give a shit what happens next, except that I’d keep pushing to bend things to suit my desires.
“Ethan,” she whispered, stumbling along with me, towards the fence.
“What did I fucking say?” I hissed, as I wrenched back on her hair, and made her yelp with pain.
