Page 66 of Ryder
“The doc could patch those up for you.”
“I don’t want anyone touching me.”
He didn’t look at all surprised, nodding slowly.
“And that’s your choice. Do you want me to get some supplies sent up, so you can patch yourself up?”
I nodded slowly, watching him walk to the door of his room, pulling it open and leaning out to speak to someone. After a brief chat, he returned, heading through the kitchen, filling the kettle on his way.
“They’re bringing some stuff up for you.”
I glanced at the door again. “Prospects?”
He nodded. “Coffee?” I let out a low moan.
“God yes, please.”
He was handing a coffee to me by the time there was a knock on the door. He retrieved the first aid supplies from whoever it was, and closed the door again.
“You okay with me letting some light in? We’re on the second floor, so nobody will see in with the curtains open.” I shrugged, and he went to the opposite side of the large space, and pulled dark curtains back, to reveal sunshine. Blue sky. Fluffy white clouds in the sky. A world full of hope and sunshine and happiness. Out there. In here, nothing but what was left of me, and my victim.
Ryder
She was trying topretend that she could manage, but once she got over the fear of baring her body with me in the room again, she was clearly struggling. I knew, because as muchas I tried to keep my eyes averted, every hiss of pain brought them right back to her. I just couldn’t take it any longer.
“Can I help, darlin’? I promise I’ll be careful.”
Her eyes were wide when she glanced at me.
“I… there are so many. I didn’t know. I could feel pain everywhere, but I couldn’t see what he was doing.”
I clenched my fists, because yet again I wanted to revive the fucker, just to kill him again, only much slower, like over several fucking weeks.
I stood by the foot of the bed, watching as she tried to mop up blood, and place dozens of small plasters over her skin.
“I’ll be able to see better than you can,” I suggested, and finally her hands dropped.
“I can’t let you do this for me,” she whispered, her eyes closing, as her cheeks darkened with embarrassment.
“Because you think I’ll get handsy? I promise I’d never do that to you.”
She swallowed hard. “I know. I’m not worried about that. I know there’s nothing sexy about me. It’s just that you’ve done so much, and you didn’t have to do any of it. I shouldn’t be here now. I should be dead, or suffering for what I did to you, and all the others. This isn’t…I don’t deserve help.”
“Jesus Christ, woman.” I moved around to the side of the bed, and snatched the wipes from her.
“Will you stop talking like you deserved to be attacked like this? Just let me help you.”
She was trembling, and it stopped me before I touched her again, because wouldn’t I just be making it fucking worse?
“Tori, do you want me to call the doc to do this?”
She shook her head vehemently.
“Do you want someone else in here to support you? Jesus. Let me see if one of the club girls might be here somewhere.”
I stood up again, and she grabbed my arm, letting go almost instantly. Too quickly, because like a bastard I wanted her fingers on me, wanted her touching me.
“I don’t want anyone else to see me. You’re all strangers, and it’s too much.”
