Page 18 of Ryder
I glared at him. “You got a problem with gays, asshole? You yell that shit at others? Think you have some kind of righteous fucking superiority?”
He groaned, starting to back up.
“Look, I was a dick, okay?”
“Yeah, I got that part.” I lunged at him, catching him as he turned to run, even though there was nowhere to go. I let his momentum, and mine, carry him face-first into the brick wall. He yelled out in pain as his face slammed into hard stone, and his nose probably broke. I pulled him back, and slammed him against it again, then threw him on the ground. I straddled him, crouching low, so I could grab the front of his shirt, and drag his head up.
“After tonight, you’re gonna think twice about being an intolerant cunt, right?”
He was desperately trying to break my hold on him.
“Jesus. Stop. I said sorry. Just let me go.”
“Did he? Did he actually say sorry like he meant it? I didn’t hear that. I heard a pathetic little bitch begging us to not hurt him.” I punched him, grinning when his head crashed back against the dirty concrete, and did it again,because it felt fucking amazing.
“Brother, maybe don’t kill the fucker. We don’t need that kind of heat on us right now.” Torch leaned close, trying to get my attention.
“Maybe he needs to learn a real fucking lesson,” I growled, grabbing the guy, and forcing him onto his front.
“What the hell?” Torch yelled, grabbing at my arms, as I grabbed the waist of the guy’s trousers and pulled at them.
“God no, stop!” The man was screaming, and Torch was hauling on my arms, and all I could think about was my need to make him feel how I’d felt. To make him feel the shock, and shame, and horror. His jeans wouldn’t fucking move, so I had to roll him again, to pull at the fastenings at his waist.
A fist hit me hard in the face, knocking me off my feet, and then I sat and stared at the terrified, bleeding man, who was scrambling up from the ground, and running. Torch ran after him, catching him around the throat, so he could talk at him, while I felt my mind whirling.
What had I been doing? I’d been so caught up in my anger, and my frustration, and his asshole behaviour and… what…I’d been trying to get his pants down?What, did I think I could rape a guy now? Was that who I was turning into? Was that what she’d done to me?
I was still sitting on my ass, my knees up, and my hands over my face, when Torch was suddenly crouching beside me.
“I’m sorry, brother. I didn’t know how else to get you to stop.”
I couldn’t speak. I was still caught up in the horror of what I just tried to do.
“Ryder, look at me.” Torch pulled at my hands, and I fought him, because my eyes were wet, and yet again, I was a weak-ass pussy, who should be manning up, and facing this shit head on.
“Dammit. Stop hiding. Look, I get that you’re all kinds of messed up. But that… you couldn’t come back from that. Ryder, you know that, right?”
I nodded, finally letting my hands fall. He looked just as horrified as I felt.
“I’m losing my mind,” I whispered, feeling my eyes burning with tears that I absolutely refused to fucking shed.
“You’ve been through something none of us can imagine, brother. Let’s get you home. We need to update Reacher anyway. He’ll be pissed we haven’t done that yet.”
Reacher. Fuck.
Nine
They hadn’t spotted thediscreet cameras set up in our little love nest, and I was glad I hadn’t removed them before they found the place. Watching my biker lover losing his shit was beautiful.Perfect. He’d torn that place apart, like it could undo what had happened between us. He denied our love. Our beautiful love. But I’d show him. I’d remind him. I’d make him realise that we were meant for each other.
I didn’t know that he’d be the one, but I realised it as I watched that video of him over and over again. That raw anger and frustration. Those strong, muscular arms flexing, as he tore at the drapery I’d worked so hard on. I remembered those muscles bulging, as he struggled against his restraints, in those random moments where he seemed to realise that things were not as he felt they should be.
Next time, I’d let him have a little more awareness. Let him struggle a little more. Maybe tear up the skin on those wrists of his a little. Let him bleed for me some more. I copied the files onto my system, and disconnected the camera feed. I didn’t needto retrieve the cameras from the nest. They were cheap crap, but they’d given me what I needed.
I scrolled back through the files, and found the clips of our night together. I’d already taken time to edit the footage, making smaller clips of my favourite moments, like the time I moved just in time to have him cover me with his cum. The way I deepthroated that large cock, and gagged on it. The way he yelled out when I clawed him with my nails. I wished I could leave a more permanent mark next time, like maybe a tattoo, or even a brand.
Ryder
Ibarely remembered returningto the clubhouse. I knew that we were in that fucking van, because I still wasn’t cleared to use my own wheels, and there’s no way I’m riding bitch. I stumbled back to my room, barely holding it together.
