Page 20 of Ice
I bit back a groan at the thought of being the boss of her.
“Is that what you like in a man? Fuck. Ignore me. That’s not appropriate.”
She bit her lip. “I think you’re deflecting, Ice, but you don’t have to hide behind any bravado with me. Tell me about your pain. Is it physical or emotional? We have plenty of time.”
I stared at my phone, and at the time.
“Well, you say that, but my appointment was for ten, and it’s already gone eleven. Don’t you have other… I dunno, what are we? Patients, I guess. Clients?”
She looked away, but I caught it; a guilty look on her face.
“Are you missing another appointment, or something, by being here?”
“Ice, you’re trying to change the subject on me.”
Nice try, doc. “I’m pretty sure that’s whatyou’redoing right now. Are you supposed to be somewhere else? I’m not a charity case. I can handle it if you need to go.” Hell, as I said it, I realised it was the last thing I wanted.
Lissa
Hewasgoingtomake me say it. Damn. I took a breath, knowing exactly how this was going to sound to him.
“Ice, calm down. It’s… it’s my day off, okay? You’re not making me miss anyone else’s appointment.”
His face seemed to freeze for a moment, then his mouth dropped open. I could see his mind racing, which sounds so weird, but I could tell he was working things out in his head as he stared at me, with wide grey eyes.
“You gave me an appointment on your day off.”
I swallowed hard, staring right back at him.
“You were on call for me, when you shouldn’t have been.”
Hell, it sounded so bad when he laid it out like that for me. I was starting to feel like some kind of predator.
“Well… I’m… you’re at a crucial time in your recovery.”
“Bullshit. Try again.”
I sipped my coffee while I stalled, because what was my excuse? It wasn’t so much that he needed me to drop everything for him. He could have seen another therapist. It wasn’t that I had nothing going on in my home life, although, I really didn’t have anything to go home to.
It was him.Something about him made me want to spend time with him. Talk to him. Listen to him. Touch him. Be touched by him. I knew I was getting in over my head with him.
I stood up, pushing my drink aside.
“I should go, unless you have more you want to talk about. For uh… for your recovery.”
He stood up too. “I’m pretty sure we’re in the middle of a conversation right now, Doc. Where you running off to?”
I sighed, feeling trapped, and knowing I was about to say too much.
“You’re right. I shouldn’t have prioritised you over… I shouldn’t have… I’ll go, Ice. Make a new appointment, and we’ll arrange for someone else to work with you.”
“What the fuck? I’m just getting used to you. I don’t want some other fucker poking around inside my head.” He was approaching me, and I backed up, because there had to be distance between us. It wasn’t appropriate to eliminate that distance, and get too close, but wasn’t I already?
The wall hit my back, but he didn’t stop advancing.
“Ice…”
“You afraid of me, Doc? Because there’s only two reasons you’d be flushed like that, and breathing so hard, and I’d prefer it to be for the other one.” He stopped close, so close. One hand braced him against the wall, his body almost touching mine. I could smell him. His cologne, or some other product he’d used. It was masculine. Musky. Dark.
