Page 46 of Ice
“My god… this is all my fault.”
“How’s that, doc? You were helping him, last I heard.”
I stared out at the road.
“I failed.”
We were silent for the rest of the journey, but when we pulled up outside my house, Has-Been grabbed my hand before I could unclip my seatbelt.
“Don’t write him off yet, please. He’s still gonna need you, maybe more than ever.”
I stared at his hand on mine, then forced myself to meet his worried gaze.
“Reacher banned me from going anywhere near him, or the club. He hates me. He blames me, and he should. I should never have let myself give in to my feelings for Ice. It was wrong. Unethical. Clearly dangerous for him.”
Has-Been frowned, finally releasing my hand.
“Reacher’s pissed. We’re all his responsibility, you know. The Club President carries a lot of weight on his shoulders. Stuff like this, with everything we’ve had going on… I’m just saying, he maybe lashed out tonight, but I don’t think he’s speaking with his head right now. His heart is ruling things for the moment. We’re family, and he’s the patriarch. One of his boys is ill, and that hurts him too.”
He smiled, and again, there was that twitch in the back of my mind. That voice saying I knew him from somewhere, that the gesture was familiar.
“Where do I know you from?”
He groaned. “Jesus, please tell me it’s not porn.”
I felt my cheeks burning, even though I knew I hadn’t seen him there. I mean, we all look at porn, right? Especially single women who really need to get off.
“Jesus… was it? I’m trying to get that stuff taken down. Trust me, that’s not the kind of guy I am. It wasn’t filmed with my consent. Fuck!”
He slammed his hand against the steering wheel.
“Wait. No, no I haven’t seen uh… that… no. It’s just that when you smile you look so familiar. Have you ever been to the rehab clinic? I’m sorry, that’s so intrusive to ask. I just meant…”
He shook his head.
“Nope, never been to your clinic. I used to act as a kid, so you probably saw me in some lame show. It was a long time ago.”
That’s it! “Oh my god! You’re Ethan Ellis! I can’t believe it.”
He grimaced. “Name’s Has-Been now, darlin’. Maybe the name makes a little more sense to you though, now you know.”
Oh wow, that’s harsh. He jerked his chin at my house.
“Get inside and get some rest, doc. Wait, give me your mobile number, and I’ll keep you updated on Ice.”
Twenty-Two
IfeltlikehellwhenI woke up. I felt sick, I felt dizzy, my head throbbed, and my nose felt like someone had set fire to it.
“The fuck…” My voice was a croak, and drew the attention of our club doctor, who leaned over me with a scowl on his face.
“You dumb fuck.”
Nice bedside manner. I tried to sit up, and the room spun again.
“Jesus.”
“Yeah, that’s what happens when some stupid prick decides to use a large amount of cocaine after being clean for almost a month. I hope you feel like shit.”
