Page 79 of Ice
I felt like she needed someone to talk to as well, and wasn’t that my job.
“You know I’m a therapist, and that offers confidentiality, with whatever you say.”
I saw her grimace, and I knew exactly what she was thinking. I’m not a therapist now, am I? I’m a disgraced wannabe therapist, with a worthless set of qualifications, because reputation in this business was everything.
“You don’t have to tell me anything private, just is he going to be okay?”
Her breath hitched, and she squeezed her eyes shut for a moment.
“I don’t know.” Her voice was a whisper, but I got the point. It was bad.
“I’m so sorry. Is he coming back soon?”
She covered her face for a moment.
“God, I hope so. Reacher needs him back, and I’m worried about his health.”
“Reacher’s?”
Alicia nodded at me, her eyes a little red with unshed tears.
“You’re a good listener. I guess that helps in your line of work. It’s a pity you can’t set up here. There’s a lot of stressed out bikers in this club, and a shitload of secrets. Seriously, it’s more dramatic here than a damn theatre group. What you just witnessed? That’s not unusual around here. There are so many frayed tempers and so much damn bravado. Nobody just talks about what’s wrong. They stew on it, and then they lose their shit, and there’s yelling, and punching, and honestly, if I didn’t love Reacher so damn much, I don’t know if I could put up with it.”
Her idea was cute, but there was little chance of any of them trusting me with their secrets, if they couldn’t even trust each other at all. Especially now that I’d been ruined professionally.
“I don’t think I’ll even be here after tonight. Reacher gave me one last chance, and I think two of his members trying to beat the crap out of each other probably just used that up… and I still don’t know what to think about this girl. She sounded so sure that they’re a couple. Why would she say that if they aren’t?”
Alicia shrugged. “Some people delude themselves into thinking something is real when it isn’t. That’s probably all it is.”
I tried not to dwell on the fact that I may have been the one deluding myself this whole time.
Thirty-Seven
Ifeltlikemylifewas hanging in the balance, more than it had ever done before. More than the knife edge of addiction versus being clean, or survival versus death. If I lost the club, that was pretty much the end for me, especially if I couldn’t get Lissa to listen to me either. What the fuck would I do?
“Listen, asshole, I’ve had just about enough of all of you as I can take right now. That woman is trouble, and you know how I know? Because I’ve never banned a single fucker from this club before and thanks to her, it’s happened twice in one week. Tell me why I shouldn’t go right ahead with that, and keep her out.”
I pulled at my hair, wishing it didn’t fucking feel like someone else’s.
“I don’t know what you want me to say, Reacher. I love her. I fucking love her, and I can’t lose her, but I can’t lose the club either. Please don’t tell me I have to choose. That’ll finish me off for good.”
He sighed, glancing at Has-Been, who was staying way too fucking quiet for once.
“You got anything to say?”
Has nodded gravely. “Just that I could have taken him, but he jumped me when I wasn’t ready. That’s all it was, otherwise, I’d have put him down like the bitch he is.”
“Fuck’s sake. I can’t believe I’m doing this, but I need you guys to think hard about what the fuck you’re doing, and what you want, because this has to end now. I want you both confined to your rooms for the next forty-eight hours, and then we’re gonna talk again. If you can’t agree to build some kind of reconciliation between you, then we’ll need to take it to the table. And Lissa? She’s gone-”
“Fuck!”
“She goes back to her placefor now, or for at least as long as you’re on lockdown. I want you to have space to think. That’s my decision. Take it or leave it, but that’s what it is.”
I was nodding, because it wasn’t a ‘she’s gone forever’, and right now I’d take what I could get.
“Agreed. Has?”
He shrugged. “Whatever, but who’s gonna tell Lissa?”
