Page 84 of Don't Hate the Player
JAKE HOOPER WASkind of feeling his new persona: guy in a suit with a fancy-ass umbrella. He couldn’t remember the last time he had even worn a suit and panicked two weeks ago when he realized the plastic-wrapped one in the back of his closet looked like it had been cut for a toddler. It hadn’t; he’d just grown a lot over the summer, but that didn’t help him when it came to having something decent to wear to the homecoming dance.
The suit he ended up wearing was new and blue. His dad had bought it for him. It was the craziest thing; by the time he got home from the match, his dad had fielded a dozen calls from press wanting to know about his prizefighting son, and he finally seemed to understand that Jake’s gaming habit was worth a damn. He wanted to know everything, mostly about the girl Jake was kissing in front of thousands of people, and when Jake told him he was taking that same girl to a dance, he drove Jake to the mall to get his son a suit. They talked a lot that day, more than they had in almost a year.
Jake knew that one day of suit shopping with his dad wasn’t worth much compared to the lifetime of relationship trauma he was looking forward to unpacking with the mandated individual therapist Wizzard provided for its league players, but it was a start.
Also, again, he lookeddamn goodin this suit. There was something about being fancy in the rain with a magnificent black umbrella—one of the long ones, not the foldy ones that bend the wrong way if you look up and sneeze at the same time—that made him feel like the star of an old-timey movie. Jake couldn’t dance to save his life, but while he was waiting outside the school doors, he was seized with an uncontrollable urge to jump up and click his heels. He thought it might feel magical, like tonight was the enchanted evening he always imagined school dances to be.
Perhaps tonight was notthatmagical. He nearly launched himself into a puddle on his third try. Luckily, Matt Pearson was there to catch his elbow and save Jake’s suit.
“It’s mad slippery, bro, watch out.” Matt had an umbrella too, but compared to Jake’s, it was nothing. “You got a famous face. Try not to smash it.”
“Thanks, Matt,” Jake replied. “I don’t know what I was trying to do.”
“Singin’ in the Rain,” Matt said. “I get it. I love that movie.”
“It’s the suit,” Jake admitted. “It’s really doing something for me.”
“Yeah, I’m sure that’s where all your newfound confidence comes from,” Matt snorted. “Def not from walking around with your hand in Emilia’s back pocket all week. Or the hundreds of thousands of dollars you’re going to rack up next year. Or going viral, having an army of gamers declare your relationship ‘goals’; can’t forgetGood Morning America, that was pretty dope. But no, you’re right.” He looked Jake up and down. “Suit’s cool too.”
Jake’s face got hotter with every word that came out of Matt’s mouth. Yeah, all of those things had happened, but on the inside he was still, you know, himself. He held his head a little higher these days and didn’t walk into a closed door every time Emilia smiled at him, but the foundational elements of Jake Hooper were mostly the same. He was just better at being Jake. Like the suit, the fabric was all there, but the fit was so much nicer.
“Thanks, man,” Jake said after an awkward pause.
“Yo, thank me for nothing. Hook me up with someGLOUnity merch or make me your assistant. I can’t do shit, but I’m fun! Actually, could you introduce me to that Ki girl on your team? I thought she was cute, but when I saw the way she handled that ice fight, whew! The cold never botheredmeanyway.”
“Ki’s gay as hell. Sorry.” Jake was not sorry, but it was a hard habit to break. He had been breaking it, though, slowly and with Emilia’s help.
“Damn it.” Matt kicked the ground and sent up a small splash.
“Wait a minute.” Jake looked over at his friend. “Aren’t you here with Penny tonight? I kind of thought you two were . . . ? you know . . .”
“Purely professional. I mean, political. We’re here as a united front. It would be pretty messed up if the VP dated the president. Besides,” he added, grinning, “she’s got bigger things on her mind. We winonehigh school election and she’s talking about studying political science in college. Wants to be the youngest congresswoman in Pennsylvania so she can change online harassment laws.”
“Wow.” Jake hadn’t known Penny for long, but that seemed exactly like something she would want to do. Before he met Emilia, he thought Penny was another one of those intimidating people who thought they were cooler than everyone else. He was right, but she was also focused, passionate, and fiercely defensive of the people she liked, a short list that now included him. She’d be a great tank, now that he thought about it. “I almost feel bad for the laws.”
Jake watched a light bulb switch on over Matt’s head. “Wait, you think I could beherassistant?”
“I think you can do anything. You’re the best Matt I know.”
Matt’s forehead wrinkled in confusion. “You meanman?”
“Nope.”
Before Jake had to explain that, he caught sight of Coach Romero’s car pulling into the school parking lot. Emilia wouldn’t be driving anytime soon, but he was glad her parents agreed to lift her eternal grounding for one more night, if only because they couldn’t really argue with a check big enough to cover most of her college tuition after taxes. Also, and this might be the suit talking, but Jake thought Emilia’s mom had a soft spot for him. Like, yeah, he aided and abetted her daughter breaking a billion rules, but he also staged a parental coup solely to make Em happy. Maybe she was just glad he wasn’t Connor. Either way, she waved at him through the window of her Jeep, and Jake waved back. Weird how much Emilia looked like her. Coach Romero basically cloned herself.
Jake hadn’t told Emilia he was wearing a blue suit and wasn’t surprised at all to see her emerge from her mom’s car in a dress that nearly matched him anyway. Emilia and Penny shrieked in unison when they felt the rain hit their hair, which Jake picked up as his cue to rush forward and hold his umbrella over his . . . wait for it . . . girlfriend. He looked through the car to make sure Matt had Penny covered, and he did. He’d make a fine congressional assistant one day.
“I’m coming back at ten,” Coach Romero threatened. “Be outside or you’re walking home.”
“I’ve walked farther!” Jake said cheerily, after he shut the car door.
“Yeah, but I haven’t,” Emilia muttered. With her heels, she didn’t have to get on her tiptoes to kiss him. “Hi, you look beautiful.”
No, come on. That’s what Jake was supposed to say! He sputtered for a moment as he walked her toward the door.
“You . . . ?same,” was what he managed to get out. “So pretty. Always.” Not amazing. The power of the suit had failed Jake for the second time.
“Good thing you play better than you talk,” Penny observed. She and Matt had fallen into lockstep with them once they got around the car. Jake thought Penny’s dress was fantastic too. Not everyone could pull off bright gold, especially with a massive, shoulder-spanning sash that declared in glittery capital letters that its bearer was “JUNIOR CLASS PRESIDENT.” He was about to feel bad for Matt when Penny pulled an extra-small “VP” button out of her purse and pinned it to his lapel.
