Page 125 of The Friend Scheme
“Yeah, sure. It’s like, whatever. Seriously, it’s fine.”
“It doesn’t sound fine. Dude, talk to me.”
“What can I say, Matt?” he says. “I just found out this guy I really like doesn’t trust me. Why do you even hang out me with me if you think I’m capable of betraying you?”
“I don’t think that.”
“You do, though. You wouldn’t keep secrets from me if you did.”
“It’s not about keeping secrets.”
He hunches his shoulders, and the fight leaves him.
“Sure it is. Just tell me: What can I do to get you to trust me? Because anything you want, I’ll do it. I know I made a mistake with the scheme, and I’m really sorry. But I promise you, I’m not trying to get your secrets anymore. I’m seriously not. All I want is to get to know you.”
“I don’t know if there’s anything you can do. Just give me time, maybe?”
He smiles. “Sure. Well, thanks for a really nice night. I always have such a good time with you.”
“No, thank you.”
He rubs my arm. “Are you sure you’re good?”
“Yeah. I’m fine. Are you good?”
“Yeah, totally. I’m going to head out, then, okay?”
“Okay.”
He hugs me, but it feels nowhere near as good as the hug at the start of the date.
Oh boy. I really messed this up.
I want to cry.
He lets me go and then climbs into his car. I do the same with mine. I watch as he drives away.
And the moment he’s gone, and I know he can’t see me…
I break down.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
So my first date was a disaster.
It’s totally mortifying. I can’t stop thinking about it and cringing. But maybe I should’ve expected this. I am, you know, myself. And maybe it’s possible my expectations were too high.
This isn’t a movie. In real life first dates don’t have to be perfect.
It’s just… I thought my first date with Jason would be. And it wasn’t. At all. That means something. I think it means something to him, too, as it’s been nearly a week, and I haven’t heard from him.
Maybe he’s just giving me space, though. I know I wasn’t the coolest. The hard part is I can see where he’s coming from. Still, I don’t think trusting him with info about my family is the best idea.
I truly don’t know what to do.
Ugh.
Boys, man. They’ll be the death of me.
