Page 135 of My Roommate from Hell
I go to the heart of the campus, the obelisk. I look up, admiring just how tall it is up close. In front of it is a wooden bench, dedicated to one of the school’s first professors. Throughout the semester I’ve seen countless different Point students sitting here, reading a book or watching something on their phone or writing in a journal.
I take a seat and look around the campus. It looks so strange being this empty.
I take my phone out of my pocket, and notice my hands are shaking. It’s because I’m becoming more and more sure of what I have to do, even if it’s terrifying.
I call Ashley.
It rings a few times, and then I get her answering machine.
I swear under my breath, and look up at the sky. Every moment counts, because I have less than a day before Zarmenus goes home. All around me is evidence of closure, of ending. If I’m going to act, I’m going to need to act now, and I’m not sure I can do that without Ashley. It’s too big, too impossible to do this without her advice. But it looks like I’m going to have to.
Then a miracle happens.
My phone starts to ring.
I swipe and accept the call.
“Hey,” says Ashley. “Sorry I missed your call, I was in the shower.”
Anxiety fills me, almost overwhelming. I nearly decide to play it coy, to change the subject so I’m not exposing myself. But screw that. If I can’t even talk about this with Ashley, I have no chance of speaking about it with Zarmenus. If I don’t properly deal with this before he leaves, I will never be able to get past it. Ever. I will hold onto the maybes and what-ifs for the rest of my life. I’m going to have to be brave now in order to avoid that.
“Something happened last night,” I say.
“With Zarmenus?”
“Yeah. He told me that he likes me.”
“Oh my God! That’s amazing! What did you say?”
“I said it back.”
“Damn, Owen! I’m so proud of you.”
I wince. “It’s not like that.”
“Then what’s it like?”
“He was drunk, and it was messy. I don’t know if he meant it in that way. It’s really confusing. I know he said he likes me but I have no idea if he was just saying that because he was drunk or if I’m reading it wrong.”
“Wait, slow down. Tell me exactly what he told you.”
“He said that he likes being with me, and he was going to say something else, but then he stopped himself. And then he told me that he likes me, and I said it back. Then I left and I ran into Tyrell who heard everything, but that’s a whole different story.”
“Wait, so the boy you like told you he likes you and you just left?”
“It’s not exactly like that but yeah, I freaked out.”
“Oh my God,” she says, laughing. “Boys really are hopeless. Why is it so hard for you to say how you feel?”
“Because I don’t know how I feel!” I say. “Or I do, but it’s not easy. I like him but it’s not going to change anything. He still has to go back to Hell, his parents have made that very clear. We can’t be together, so who cares even if I do like him?”
“For one, I do. And I do want to remind you that unless you’ve learned psychic powers at Point, you don’t know what’s going to happen.”
“I know! That’s why I’m freaking out. All the evidence is pointing to it not working. What if I tell him how I feel and he leaves anyway? I keep trying to figure out a way it’ll work and I can’t see it.”
“So you’re going to do nothing?”
“No, I want to tell him, but it’s so hard for me. I’m not an optimistic person. I don’t know how I’m supposed to do something if I’m not sure it’ll work out. How do you try when you know you can fail?”
