Page 54 of My Roommate from Hell
I don’t feel as if I am in any danger, but Zarmenus is clearly in trouble, and I don’t want to be around to listen while he gets disciplined by his father. I grab the door handle and yelp, recoiling my hand. The metal was burning hot, and has left an angry red mark on my palm.
“You should stay,” says Maleilius. “Zarmenus has always cared too much about what other people think of him. An audience might make him come to his senses.”
The demon king gives me a stern look, then nods toward the couch. Nursing my hand, I go back and sit down.
“Your mother is beside herself,” says Maleilius. “She said she didn’t know what she would do if she had to see you, and I think we’d all agree we prefer Point University the way it is, not as a flaming crater. Thank darkness for her self-control.”
Zarmenus flips through the stack of magazines. They’re all tabloid trash, the kinds they sell at newsstands or supermarkets, like the one I saw at the coffee shop. Only these ones are painting Zarmenus in a far less favorable light.
The headlines are all pretty, ahem, damning, even if they are accurate.
HELL BOY GOES WILD
DEMON PRINCE LOSES CONTROL
ZARMENUS HAVING HELL OF A TIME
As unserious as the titles are, Maleilius is clearly bothered by them. The flames on his face are growing bigger with every passing second.
“It seems you’ve forgotten,” says Maleilius, “you aren’t here to have fun.”
Zarmenus rolls his eyes.
“Don’t you roll your eyes at me!”
Zarmenus’s shoulders slump, and he starts picking at his fingernail. “Sorry.”
“You’re here,” growls Maleilius. He might’ve been cheerful the first time I met him, but this time there’s no mistaking him for the king of Hell. “To set a good example. To show humans that we are good, honest people. We are up against thousands of years of preconceptions, and it’s up to you to show the humans who we really are.”
“I know.”
“You are not here to be some irresponsible party boy!”
“I know, Dad, I’m sorry.”
“I don’t even recognize you,” says Maleilius. “Who is this boy that I’m looking at? Who is this?”
He points at one of the magazines. As his black nail touches the paper, it catches fire for a second, sending smoke twirling up into the air. The flames vanish as quickly as they appeared.
“People change at college,” says Zarmenus. “Right, Owen?”
I find my throat is totally dry, making it hard to speak.
“Er, yup.”
Did I seriously just say “yup” in front of demonic royalty?
“In any case,” says Maleilius, “this needs to stop. You’re confirming long-held biases and prejudices and it can’t go on for a second longer.” He moves closer so he towers over his son, who flinches.
“Do you understand?” he asks.
I’ve never seen Zarmenus like this. He’s normally brash and overconfident, like nothing ever bothers him. But this clearly does. I get not enjoying being scolded by a parent, but it seems like this runs deeper.
“I’m sorry,” says Zarmenus. “I’ll be better.”
“I know you will be,” says Maleilius, and he puts his hand on his son’s cheek. I keep expecting Zarmenus to be more like the boyI’ve been sharing a room with all this time: for him to bite back or roll his eyes and say something snarky. “It’s your last chance. You will settle down and get people to fall in love with you, is that very clear?”
“Crystal,” says Zarmenus, whose voice is shaking.
