Page 99 of My Roommate from Hell
He’s said that already, but now he means in a non-platonic way.
“Demons don’t really date,” he says. “But in human shows dating is like this big, exciting thing. There’s always this ‘will they, won’t they’ thing that seems so fun. And when I first met you I was like, that’s a guy I could date. So I don’t want you thinking for even a second that I, or anyone else, thinks what Adam said, okay? Because it’s not true.”
“Okay,” I say. “Sorry I’m like this.”
“Don’t ever apologize for your thoughts, not to me. Feeling better?”
“Much,” I say.
I put my headphones back on.
But wait.
Did Zarmenus just say that he wanted to date me for real?
As I’m waking up, I feel something cold and wet on my ankle. I kick my leg, shaking it off, and something long and dark falls off the bed and onto the ground with a heavy thud. I sit up, a scream caught in my throat.
It was a tentacle. A freaking giant tentacle.
I’m frozen in place as it slowly retreats, disappearing into the murky darkness under our bunk bed. As soon as it vanishes, my entire body shudders. I check my ankle. The skin feels cold, and has turned slightly pink, but other than that, I’m fine.
I guess last night’s quiet was too much to ask for. I take in a few breaths, letting myself settle. Why did I say to Zarmenus that I was okay with the terrors? I know it comes with the territory, and they’re not his fault. Keeping a wary eye on the darkness under the bed, I send him a message telling him what happened.
My phone buzzes.Oh no I’m sorry!! I’ll deal with it after class.
I imagine him going to war against the monster, which makes me laugh. Then I remember what he said last night. He pretty much said he thinks I’m boyfriend material. Real boyfriend material. My phone buzzes again, only this time the message isn’t from him. It’s from Leeke.
Come to my office as soon as you can.
I brace myself, then do an internet search for Zarmenus to see if there’s an explanation as to why Leeke wants to see me. Videos of last night are circulating. Some are of him in his true form, but the one gaining the most traction is the one of us leaving the bathroom. I guess one of them lied when they said they had deleted it, or had a backup. I watch the clip, and see myself emerging from the bathroom, looking incredibly guilty. This must be what Leeke wants to talk about.
I climb back into bed and face-plant.
I give myself a few minutes, then get up and go to Leeke’s office.
“Good morning,” she says as she lets me inside. Zarmenus is already sitting in his chair, looking like a scalded schoolboy. I have a tiny amount of hope that she has called us here for a reason other than the video, but that hope is dying with every second that passes.
“I’m sure you both know why you’re here,” she says.
“I’m sorry,” says Zarmenus. “I couldn’t keep my hands off him.”
“That’s sweet,” she says. “I know it might not seem like it to you, but I remember what it’s like to be young. Your enthusiasm for each other isn’t the issue.”
It isn’t?
“In America,” says Leeke, “the legal drinking age is twenty-one. I expected both of you to know that.”
I start to blush. I did only have one drink, but I doubt that line of argument will do me much good. I’ve seen the video a few times now, and we’re both holding cups in it.
“It’s clear now that your every action is a potential worldwide headline,” she says. “I know that’s a lot of pressure to put on two people as young as you. But I wanted to remind each of you that Point has a strict no drugs or alcohol policy for underage students.”
“I wasn’t technically drinking alcohol,” says Zarmenus. “Unless drinking nightshade potion is a crime.”
Leeke glares at him, but the corners of her lips hint at a smile. “All I ask is the two of you refrain from breaking too many rules. I’d hate to tell your parents, Zarmenus. As for you, Owen, remember that your actions now may very well define you for the rest of your life. Before you do anything you have to think:Is this what I want coming up if a future employer were to research me?”
She’s right. I don’t really want a clip of me drinking underage and leaving a bathroom with a guy to be the first impression I make to anyone who looks me up online.
“We’ll be better,” I say.
