Page 38 of Rescuing Josiah
“You’ve always been a romantic, Chelsea, always waiting for the perfect love story. I don’t want love to pass you by because you think you're waiting for something better.”
Both her parents knew about her crush on Josiah. Well, they knew she had fallen for someone at work, they just didn't know his name or anything about him. They’d always encouraged her to follow her heart, so she wasn't sure why her mom worried about her doing just that.
“Your dad and I won't be around forever, my darling,” Mom continued. “And we don’t want you to be alone when we pass.”
They had no extended family. Both sets of grandparents had passed when she was a baby, her mom had been an only child, and her dad had one brother who had died as a teenager. Therehadn't been aunts and uncles and cousins when she was growing up, it had always just been the three of them, so she could see why her mom was worried about what was going to happen to her after they were gone.
“I’ll be fine, Mom. You don’t have to worry about me.” As she said the words, Chelsea’s gaze shifted to the man standing awkwardly in the corner. Josiah hadn't left the room when she answered her mom’s call, and he was watching her with longing he wasn't even trying to hide.
Things were complicated between them, but they were improving. While she still gave herself maybe a twenty percent chance of Josiah ever falling in love with her, she did believe he was going to let her in as a friend. Maybe once she knew for sure Josiah would never love her, she could start looking for someone else.
Maybe.
But honestly, her heart already belonged to the man she knew could give her everything if he believed her when she told him that he deserved all the good things the world had to offer.
“Whatever happens, I’ll always be okay, Mom,” she assured her mother, not wanting her parents to spend a second worrying about her. They should be enjoying every moment of their retirements.
“Oh, my darling, I know you’ll always be okay, it’s just who you are. But it’s a mother’s job to worry about her only daughter.”
Chelsea laughed. “You’ve always been the very best mommy a girl could ever ask for.” It was true, her parents had waited a long time to have her, and by the time they were pregnant with her, they’d already given up on the idea of having a child of their own. They had given her everything she needed and wanted, not just material things, but of themselves as well. She was truly blessed to be their daughter.
“We love you more than words can express, my darling.”
“Love you bigger than the whole moon, Mama,” Chelsea said the words she’d repeated thousands of times over the years. When she was four, the moon had seemed like the biggest thing in the world, and she would always beg to stay up past her bedtime to go outside and stare at it. At four, it seemed fitting to tell her mommy and daddy that her love for them was bigger than the moon. Twenty-three years later, she still felt the same way.
“Love you bigger than the whole sun, my darling.”
At her declaration of love for her mom, Josiah had turned and was hurrying out of the room. Knowing that if she didn't go after him, she could lose all the progress she’d made with him these last few days, Chelsea was already standing up.
“I have to go, Mom, I'm sorry, we’ll talk later.” If she thought Josiah hated the idea of her being in danger like this by going undercover, it was nothing compared to how her mom was going to react when this was over and Chelsea told her everything. But she’d convince her mom she had handled it all just fine, the same way she seemed to have convinced Josiah she could handle it. That she was an asset and not a liability, even if she didn't have the same level of training and experience he did.
“Okay, my darling. I’ll talk to you later. Love you.”
“Love you, Mom.”
Ending the call, Chelsea tossed her phone onto the couch and hurried through the house. She found Josiah opening the door to the basement, and her heart dropped. He was withdrawing again, and she hated it.
“Please don’t pull away from me,” she begged, and Josiah froze.
“You want that,” he said softly. “What your parents have. I can never give you that. Even if I wanted to, I can't be the man that you want. That you need.”
“Would you stop telling me what I want and need,” she growled in a very un-Chelsea-like voice. Normally, she never yelled at people, it just wasn't her. There were other ways she could stand up for herself without losing her temper, but Josiah had pretty much pushed her right to the edge.
It was so demeaning to imply she didn't even know her own mind.
She was an adult, she’d been in love with this grumpy man for years, she knew how she felt, knew what she wanted, knew what she was prepared to give, and knew that if she got her heart broken, it would be worth it to support Josiah any way she could.
“I know you're hurting. I can't imagine what it’s like to lose people you care about the way you did, to watch them die and know you were supposed to die too. I get why you’re angry, and I get why you push people away, I really do. But it’s no excuse to keep acting like I'm some stupid little girl who doesn’t know what she wants. I want you, no amount of wishing on your part is going to change it. If you don’t like it, tough. That would be a you problem, not a me problem. Now stop hiding from me and go get your sexy little backside ready for the hot tub while I go change. Please,” she added, because while she would stand up for herself whenever she needed to, she didn't like being rude.
For a long moment, Josiah just stood and stared at her, mouth hanging open, like she’d suddenly grown wings and started fluttering around the room.
Then his mouth snapped closed, and he stalked toward her, stopping right in front of her so she had to crane her neck back to meet his gaze.
“Sorry. You’re right. I just …” His fingers raked through his short hair. “I don’t get what you see in me.”
“You don’t have to. You just have to accept that I see it.” No one else had to understand what made her fall in love with Josiah, it wasn't anyone’s business. Chelsea didn't care if peoplethought it was weird because Josiah wasn't the most lovable guy around with his surly attitude and perpetual scowl. He was lovable to her, and that was all that mattered.
“You're something else, aren't you,” he said. Leaning down, he touched a quick but tender kiss to her forehead before heading out into the small backyard.
