Page 105 of Prize for the King
I scoff, shaking my head. “My ritual?”
“Yeah.” Khay grins, showing off his white fangs. “For when you finally feel safe and can let go after a long time of exertion. You rage, let it all out, and then you get tired and sick. A ritual.”
I pull my knees up to my chin and close my eyes, thinking. Khay strokes my head hesitantly, and when I don’t push him away, he crawls into bed and settles by my side, pulling me to lean on his chest.
“I do feel safe,” I admit after a long silence. “It’s strange. I should be anything but. I’m far away from home in a foreign country, and my old life was torn to shreds, nothing left. But this room… It’s like I can finallyrest.”
He hums, playing with my hair. “Maybe your ordeal didn’t begin that day Magnar forced you to marry him. Maybe you’re recovering from something larger, hm?”
I agree with him, but I won’t say it, because then he’ll ask what my ordeal was. Though, was my father the only source of suffering and tension? No, he was just a part of it.
“I would have never allowed myself to scream at someone before,” I say, frowning. “Because I knew I’d be punished. But you… None of you did.”
“We fight sometimes, too. It’s inevitable when you’re so close with other people, my lady. Magnar and us, knights—we’re like brothers. Maybe closer, because you don’t choose what family you’re born into, and we chose each other. No one’s going to lock you up for having an opinion or a bad day, you know. You’re right to feel safe here. No one will hurt you ever again.”
I wrestle with that thought, and for some reason, I don’t feel relief. Instead, I’m terrified. I don’t know how tobesafe, I realize. It feels like a trick, a cruel promise that will be broken when it will hurt me the most.
“Was Magnar very angry?”
Khay’s chest moves under my cheek as he sighs. “More like frustrated. Angry with himself, not you. He’s really trying, and it didn’t help that… Ah, well. You both need time. We all do.”
“What didn’t help?”
He clears his throat to answer, but there’s a knock on the door. It swings open, and Raduna comes in, bearing a tray.
“Good, you’re up.” He smiles, sitting on the mattress with the tray in his lap. “I’ve got soup, bread, and more herbs from the healer. And these here are tomatoes from my greenhouse! I planted them before we rode to take Farneer. They came out really well.”
I sit up, taking a bowl of small red, yellow, and purplish fruit. “I’ve never seen tomatoes like these.”
“Well, there are many varieties,” Raduna says with a smile. “I like breeding new kinds, too, though it takes years to see results. Try oneand tell me if it’s good.”
I select the darkest tomato and pop it in my mouth. It’s flavorful and sweet, and just a little tart. “It’s delicious!”
Raduna beams at me, cheeks purpling with a blush, and Khay chuckles under his breath, stealing a tomato.
“See? This is courting,” he says after he swallows. “Raduna brings you fruit from his own garden, that he planted and picked himself. When he chopped off the heads of people who attacked you, that was courting, too. He isn’t usually that violent.”
Raduna nods, his flush deepening, though he holds my gaze without flinching when I study his face.
“But why courting? You already have me. Magnar married metwice.He doesn’t need to court me.”
“But he wants to,” Raduna says with a small smile. “As do I. Tell me, my queen, do you prefer tomatoes to your enemies’ heads, then?”
I can’t help it—I laugh, covering the bowl before Khay steals more of my courting gift. “Well, I love these. But… I appreciate being protected, too. Thank you for everything.”
After I’m done eating, my knights help me undress. Khay opens one of the large wardrobes built into the walls of the room, revealing a lot of compartments filled with silks, lace, jewelry… He takes out a nightshirt, thinner and much more beautiful than the ones I brought with me. It’s midnight blue, long but narrow, and trimmed with gorgeous, shimmery lace.
“Our fashions are a bit different from yours,” he says when I run my fingers over the smooth fabric, sighing with pleasure. “These were Agnidari-sized and have been taken in and trimmed to fit you. You’ll have your own bespoke wardrobe, of course. These are things to wear in the meantime.”
“It’s beautiful, but quite indecent.” I bite the inside of my lip, hesitating. I’d love to wear it, but it’s definitely not proper attire.
“You can always sleep without any clothes on,” Raduna says, settling his warm palms on my shoulders, his thumbs pressing in blissfully on either side of my spine. “I assure you we won’t complain.”
I step from foot to foot, finally snatching the nightshirt from Khay’s hands. I shimmy it on, and both Khay and Raduna watch me intensely, then run their hands down the silk clinging to my breasts and back. I step away with a shaky breath.
“Um. I’m still quite sore.”
“Why don’t we make you come once or twice?” Raduna asks, voice dropping to a low rumble. “It would help you sleep better, my queen.”
