Page 188 of Prize for the King
“You’ve read them enough. Breathe, my queen. Anke is right. Youhave torelax if you want to help Magnar. Do you understand me? You will fail if you push yourself like this. This isn’t a physical fight. You need a sharp mind.”
I sigh, but it’s so difficult to let go. As soon as my breathing deepens, panic sets in. If I stop pushing, if I let go for just a moment, Magnar will be lost.
It feels as though my unwavering attention is the only thing keeping him alive. But that’s wrong, isn’t it?
I let my knights strip me, and when they feed me luxurious chocolate truffles, I open my mouth obediently and chew, making myself enjoy their taste. The bath is brought in, hot and fragrant, and they kneel on three sides of me, their hands washing, stroking, kneading my skin until my head falls back into Arvi’s waiting palm, and I relax.
Yet even though my body gives in, my mind doesn’t. Panicky, half-formed thoughts shoot through my head at high velocities. I am lost in my private world of terror, lost and absent. I don’t even hear what they say, and when skillful fingers part me under water, I jolt with a gasp.
“No! I don’t deserve it.”
Khay pauses, his hand on my thigh, brows arched. “It will help you relax.”
I shake my head frantically. “No. I can’t… He’s in the dungeons, bleeding, hurt, maybe starving. I can’t… I have to get out. I need tothink.”
Raduna sighs, though his eyes are kind, his expression patient. “Caliane, he’ll be devastated if the baby gets hurt. Please. Let us help you.”
I shake my head again. “I deserve to be punished.”
Arvi laughs suddenly, leaning over my face. He sits behind me so he’s upside down, his sharp teeth bared in a grin right above my eyes.
“Yes, you should be punished,” he says with a soft laugh. “It will clear your head, won’t it, sweet? What if you can just get your punishment, let go of this guilt?”
It would be bliss.“Please,” I whisper. “Yes. That’s it. Punish me.”
“Arvi, do you know what you’re doing?” Raduna murmurs, holding my hand.
“Yes. I had it done to me a few times. It was very helpful. I won’t be too hard on her, but I’ll give her relief. You’ll watch. If you think I’m overdoing it, you’ll stop me.”
“What are you going to do?” I ask, sitting up, dread and hope mixing in my belly.
Arvi grins, cupping my cheek. “What I promised you long ago. I’m going to put you over my knee. Now, Caliane, you can tell me to stop at any time, and I will. Do you understand? I want youto say ‘stop’ if you can’t handle it. Don’t be a hero. Magnar was, and look where that got him.”
I nod slowly, though my mind is made up. I won’t stop him. I want whatever punishment he’ll dish out, because then maybe the guilt will finally settle, and I’ll be able tothink.
Khay snorts. “Look at her. She won’t tell you to stop even if she’s dying from pain.”
Arvi hums. “Yes. Still, I want you to know you have this option, Caliane. Come out now. Let’s get you dry.”
No one speaks as they stroke my body with soft towels. Their movements are gentle and attentive, and I step from foot to foot, not really understanding what my punishment is supposed to be. They are being as kind as always.
When I’m dry, Arvi sits down on the couch, his legs comfortably spread. He points at his lap.
“I want you to lie down here with your ass up. Can you do that?”
I swallow with difficulty. “Do you truly mean to… spank me? Like a child?”
He raises an eyebrow. “Have you ever been spanked?”
I shake my head. “No, I was threatened with it a few times, but it never happened.” I lick my lips nervously and stare, unsure. My face feels hot, my body tingling with embarrassment. Oh, it will be humiliating. Inexplicably, I slicken with arousal.
Right. Because Ilikebeing humiliated.
Arvi adjusts himself, spreading his legs wider. He’s hardening, I realize. This is a sexual thing. I brace my shoulders and go to him, climbing on the couch. He helps me get settled until my face is pressed into the cushions, my knees spread wide, my back arched and butt in the air. I flinch when he strokes my butt cheek in a slow, reverent caress.
“We can stop at any time. I’ll watch you, as will the others. If wethink you can’t handle it, we’ll stop. You can cry. You can be loud. This is a release.”
My breath quickens until it’s shallow and fluttering. Arvi hums his courting song, lightly caressing my skin. I tense, bracing as dark moths of fear and thrill take off in my belly. He lifts his hand and slaps my flesh with a harsh sound.
