Page 76 of My Year of Saying No
Seb assessed the room left on his plate, then looked back. ‘I’ll get some second go round.’
‘I don’t know where you put it all,’ I said, genuinely curious. I’d seen the size of the meals he could put away, but there wasn’t an ounce of fat on him. Muscle, yes. Oh lord, there was plenty of that, but definitely no fat.
He shrugged. ‘Burn it off.’
An idea of a very efficient and what I dangerously imagined to be a very enjoyable way of burning it off shot into my head unannounced and uninvited.
‘Do you want to go outside?’
‘What?’ I squeaked, my interrupted thoughts still very much not PG and momentarily misinterpreting Seb’s question. Fortunately, or unfortunately, depending on whether or not you were my libido, he clarified the matter.
‘You just look like you could do with a little fresh air. It’s quite warm in here.’
I knew he’d been involved in several negotiations when he’d been deployed and I could see that his skills in tact hadn’t left him. Sadly, I didn’t possess the same ability to sip champagne, look glamorous and remain a nice, normal colour as my sister and Jess did. Instead, it had the regular propensity of creating two high spots of colour on my cheeks which gradually grew the more I drank.
‘Oh crap. I look like bloody Noddy already, don’t I?’ I groaned, dropping my head and studying some crumbs on my eco picnic plate.
‘Nope,’ Seb’s steady, calm voice replied.
He adjusted position in front of me and tilted himself down a little until I looked up and met his eyes.
‘Liar.’
Unruffled, he shook his head. ‘You’re a tiny bit pink on your cheeks, but then so are a lot of people. It’s warm and there’s alcohol.’ He shrugged as if that was all that needed saying.
‘You’re not pink! You’re a nice normal colour and you’ve had alcohol too.’
‘But I don’t have your beautiful peaches-and-cream skin tone.’
‘I don’t think it’s all that beautiful right now,’ I said, aware that there was an edge of petulance in my voice.
‘Well, I do, and always will,’ Seb replied, matter-of-factly, taking my now empty plate from me and putting it on the side. ‘Come on, let’s go out on the balcony for a few minutes and get some fresh air.’
‘We’re in London. I’m not sure there’s a lot of that about.’
‘You do have a point. OK. As near to it as we can get then.’
I raised my eyes, unexpectedly finding Seb watching me. ‘What?’
‘You. I… just don’t get why you don’t have more confidence in yourself when it comes to anything outside work.’
I shrugged. ‘I don’t know.’
‘Then I reckon that’s something we need to work on. You already took the step of saying no to stuff you don’t want to do. Now it’s time to start saying no to stuff you don’t want to feel too.’
‘Like Noddy?’
He grinned, standing aside for me to step through onto the wrap-around balcony of Harry’s penthouse apartment.
‘I was always a fan of Noddy, actually. I think it was the cool car.’
I rolled my eyes at him and walked out, feeling the chill air hit my burning cheeks as a shiver rippled through me. Immediately, Seb was close, and I felt another shiver, but this one was far more pleasant. And possibly far more dangerous.
20
‘Are you OK? Do you want me to go and get your coat?’
I shook my head, staying him with a hand on his forearm. ‘No. Thank you. I’m fine.’
