Page 90 of Winter at Wishington Bay
I glanced over my shoulder out of the window for a moment, before turning back to her. ‘Honestly, I’m not sure. I suppose I should have known this would happen at some point. It was just a bit of a pipedream to think I could carry on as I was.’
‘It’s good to have dreams, Soph. Pipe or otherwise. It’s what drives us. It’s what brought you to us, even if you didn’t know it.’
I gave the rabble outside another brief glance. ‘I’m not sure everyone will be so thrilled about that right now.’
Flora gave another tinkling wave. ‘Nonsense. You’ve been a wonderful addition to the village.’ She tilted her head to one side, studying me for a moment. ‘I hope all this doesn’t mean you’ll be leaving us.’
I lifted my head from where I’d been studying the toes of my boots. Flora read something in my expression and reached out, taking my hand and pulling me gently away from the window and out of the sight of the intrusive eyes and camera lenses.
‘It doesn’t matter to any of us what your title is, or why you chose not to share that with anyone. We love you for who you are, and even if you take that title back up, it won’t change anything. “A rose by any other name” and all that,’ she added.
‘I still should have told you.’
‘It doesn’t make any difference. I know you will have had your reasons and we respect that, and anyone who cares about you will understand that.’
‘I think it will make a difference to some people.’
Flora’s look was kind, if a little sad. ‘Have you heard from him?’
I shook my head. ‘He made it very clear he didn’t appreciate being kept in the dark about my background. Honesty is a rather sensitive subject for him these days, which I can understand after his experience with Serena.’ I thought of her possessive stance and Nate’s cold look. ‘Although he looked like he was about to forgive her all that from what I saw when I went to the house yesterday.’
‘You didn’t lie, love.’
‘I lied by omission in Nate’s eyes. And maybe that’s true.’
‘You did what was right for you, and that’s what matters. You had your reasons and it’s up to you whether you choose to share those. And if you do, it’s got to be when you’re ready and only because you want to. Not because of some misplaced sense of duty.’
I gave an automatic eyeroll Flora smiled. ‘Something tells me you’ve had more than your share of “duty-calls” experiences.’
I gave a watery smile. ‘Something like that.’
‘That’s what I thought. So, don’t go putting any extra pressure on yourself now when you don’t need to. We’re all here for you, whatever you decide to do. Whatever you need, just let us know.’ I gave her a hug then ran a hand back over my hair, smoothing it automatically, unwilling to give the gossip mongers any fodder about me ‘looking dishevelled’.
Maybe Flora was right. I wasn’t any different now that the whole village knew my real name, and probably my entire bloodline, if the gossip merchants had been as thorough as they usually were. Getting the facts correct, however, was often far further down their list. For those I was lucky enough to call friends, I could only hope that it wouldn’t matter. That, as Flora said, they cared enough about me not to be bothered by any of it. I would still be the same old Sophia to them. Of course, it mattered to people like Corinne and Serena, but their motives were different. They were in it for what they could get out of it. I’d met enough of those sort of people to last a lifetime and, although Wishington Bay was pretty close to perfect, there was always going to be the odd blot on the landscape. In this instance, it had been Corinne, helping my world implode.
And then there was Nate McKinley. Clearly, I’d made a rather spectacular error of judgement in that area. I’d been swept up enough by him to think he really cared. But he hadn’t. Not really. At least not enough, or as much as I’d thought he had. Maybe he was really just a lonely man looking for a soft touch and a warm bed.
So why hadn’t he followed through with Corinne?
Having now seen Serena in the flesh, that was a pretty easy question to answer. Corinne and Serena were two sides of the same coin. Nate had been looking to try something different – maybe he even believed that was what he wanted. What he needed at the time. But, in the end, he’d returned to what he knew. What, somewhere inside, he truly wanted. I tried to tell myself he had cared about me at some point, in some way. Just not enough.
I’d given my messages a quick scan before deleting them wholesale earlier today but there’d been nothing from Nate – not that I’d really expected there to be. His expression and body language the day before had spoken volumes. Any thought that things might go somewhere with him had been a ridiculous flight of fancy. I’d got caught up in the excitement of someone actually wanting me – and me wanting them – and my romantic fantasies, kept in sensible check for so many years, had run on unhindered. As I moved, still feeling the ache in my body from what had turned out to be a rather active weekend, I knew I needed to ignore those physical reminders and put Nate out of my mind. It was over. Pushing my shoulders back and adjusting my coat, I tried to focus on that thought. The only trouble was, it didn’t stop me missing him. Being with Nate, right from the beginning, before anything remotely romantic had begun to form, had been about so much more than just romance. It had been about fulfilling a need to be with someone who listened, who laughed, who had his own opinions but who also respected mine and, most of all, about being with someone who I could finally be myself with. Unfortunately, as far as Nate was concerned, I hadn’t been myself at all.
The door handle gave another rattle and Flora strode back to the front of the shop, yanking the blind down on the door.
‘Honestly, what’s wrong with these people?’ She shook her head as she headed back towards me.
I gave a shrug. I’d never been one for gossip, either in print or real life, but I knew some thrived on it. There was probably some psychology in there somewhere but I’d never had enough interest to look into it.
‘People clearly have far too much time on their hands, clamouring after gossip about people they don’t even know!’ Flora’s observation was probably as good an explanation as any. Outside, the mob clamoured and chattered and occasionally peered in the window.
‘I need to get rid of this lot somehow. They’re blocking the shop and ruining your trade.’
Flora gave another airy wave. ‘Don’t you worry about me, love. They’ll move on soon enough. It’s you I’m worried about.’
I returned the wave with a lightness I didn’t exactly feel as I prepared to leave. By the look on her face, Flora wasn’t buying it. In my pocket, my phone vibrated again. I’d turned the ringer off but apparently that wasn’t enough. Changing my number was rapidly being moved to the top of my to do list. I pulled out the phone, readying to switch it off entirely when I saw that it was Ned calling.
‘Hi,’ I answered.
