Page 31 of You Only Live Once
‘I don’t think you could ever just be a notch on someone’s bedpost.’
‘Believe me, I could. Not that I realised that at the time.’
Jack’s face grew serious. ‘Then they were an idiot.’
I gave a small head tilt and grinned. ‘I agree. They were, but you don’t have to flatter me, you know. I’m not going to throw you out.’
He cleared his throat and pushed a hand back through his hair. ‘Best to be safe,’ he said, grinning.
‘I prefer honesty.’ I grinned back. ‘Don’t forget, I already know you. You don’t need to try and impress me. Anyway, what time is that documentary on?’
Jack glanced at his watch. ‘About five minutes.’
‘OK. You go and find it on the TV and I’ll make a cuppa. Tea or coffee?’
‘What are you having?’
‘Just answer the damn question, Jack.’
‘Coffee then, please. Thanks.’
‘OK, I’ll bring it through.’
10
That night, as I sat in bed, I reflected on what a pleasant evening it had been. Having my family’s company was one thing, but the evening spent with Jack had been different. There was conversation, silence at times too but it was an easy silence, with neither of us feeling a need to fill it. It had been a long time since I’d experienced that easy comfort, and the truth was I didn’t think I’d ever feel that way again. Perhaps subconsciously I’d told myself Ishouldnever feel that way again, and it was this thought that churned around in my stomach now. I liked Jack, but I wasn’t romantically inclined towards him. I appreciated that he had movie star looks and a body to die for, but it was like appreciating art for its beauty. It was easy to see the attraction, but I didn’t want it on my wall.
I’d told him I knew him, but it was clear from the last several weeks that Jack Coulsdon-Hart had changed, and those changes were definitely for the better. Perhaps, like he said, this had always been the true Jack. It’s just that before it was buried beneath expectations and bluster and the ability to have his pick of women without much thought. I suppose all of us had changed to a certain extent. Time does that to you. Circumstances do that to you. Though Jack seemed to have grown out of his experiences. I’m not sure I could say the same.
But I was happy where I was. I had my family, and my work, which I’d been lucky to have enough success with to enable me to buy a beautiful place to live. I missed Mike every day but there was nothing I could do to bring him back, and there were plenty of people in far worse positions than I was. I was grateful for all that I had. I would never stop thinking it had been unbearably cruel to have my husband snatched from me, but I was thankful for the time that we did have together. Nothing would ever dim those memories or that love. Jack might be right when he said the universe may provide you with more than one soulmate, but I wasn’t prepared to take the risk. I’d had my heart shattered once before and I wasn’t prepared to go through that again.
* * *
‘You still up for coming to visit my parents?’ said Jack.
I could hardly say no, knowing the premiere was looming, and the relief on my agent’s face when I told her there was a chance I’d be coming for a short time had been obvious.
‘The publishers will be thrilled, darling. This will give us more exposure and more leverage when it comes to negotiating your next contract.’
I tried not to freak out at the word exposure and concentrate on the fact that I didn’t have to stay long, and that I had moral support in the large form of Jack. Assuming he didn’t disappear off with a starlet/model/both. I hadn’t actually considered how many beautiful people I’d be surrounded by, and decided it was best not to go down that road.
‘I said I would.’
‘I know. It’s just that I think it’s fair to warn you—’
‘Oh God. This sounds bad. Is it bad?’
‘If you stop panicking for a moment, I’ll tell you.’
I sat down immediately and looked up, feeling my eyes wide as I waited for the news.
‘My parents felt the best thing to do, having not seen their eldest son for several years, was to make a gathering of it. It seems they’ve invited a few people.’
‘How many is a few?’ I asked.
He was shifting his feet and making a conscious attempt not to let his gaze meet mine. ‘Mmmfty or so,’ he mumbled, suddenly incredibly interested in the poker resting on the fireplace.
‘I’m sorry. How many?’
