Page 15 of Booking Burke
Duel emotions barreled through Eli’s body. He loved the way Burke looked wearing his clothes. It was almost like they branded Burke as his own. The flip side of this was Burke leaving. In the years he’d spent existing in this house there had never been the kind of light and happiness in it that Eli experienced when Burke was here. Making matters worse was that the house felt emptier than ever when Burke left.
Shit, should he be thinking like this after only knowing the man for a few days? Was it possible to have feelings like this over such a short period of time? It had taken years for Eli to realize he was in love with Jensen. He’d felt instant attraction to his middle school best friend, but it wasn’t until years later when Jensen was pondering N.C. State, that Elirealized what losing him would actually mean. He’d cried for two days straight. When his face was dry and he could finally come out of his room, that’s when he realized he was in love with Jensen.
This was different. Burke wasn’t going anywhere. He lived here in Salem and had mentioned tonight that he wanted to join the Salem Police Department when he graduated from the academy. There was nothing in what happened today to indicate that Burke wanted out.
“Earth to Eli? Come in, Eli!” Burke was shooting him a concerned look.
Giving his head a small shake, Eli could see a now naked Burke waving to him from the kitchen floor. “Shit, were you saying something?”
Climbing back to his feet, Burke pulled Eli up to his full height. “You looked like you were a million miles away. Are you okay?”
Was he okay? How could he be? Eli just realized he was in love with Burke Sampson. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just in a post-orgasmic fog. I’ve gotta get out of this uniform. I’ll be right back. Are you hungry?”
“I’m good.” Burke grinned.
Holy fucking shit! Eli’s heart was thundering in his chest. What the hell did he do now? Did he keep things cool? Or did he tell Burke that this thing going on between them was more than just physical?
Stripping out of his uniform, Eli secured his gun in the safe. He pulled on a pair of sleep pants and grabbed a second pair for Burke. With his heart still racing, he sat on the edge of the bed. The last time he’d had these kinds of feelings for another man it ended so badly that he’d moved a thousand miles to get away from the scandal. He’d lost everyone who’d ever meant anything to him in his life.
Eli knew he wasn’t in for a repeat of what happened in South Carolina. All of his friends and coworkers here knew he was gay. The only wildcard in this scenario was Burke. He was so young. Only twenty-one years old. He had the world by the balls. Why the hell would Burke want to throw that all away on him?
“Hey,” Burke was standing in the doorway. “You okay?”
“Yeah, fine. Just more tired than I thought.” Eli hated deflecting. Hewastired, but he also wasn’t brave enough to confess his feelings. Not yet, anyway.
“Those for me?” Burke pointed at the pair of sleep pants clutched in Eli’s hands.
“Sorry. Time just got away from me.” He offered the pants to Burke, who slipped them on before sitting next to him on the bed.
“Looks like you’ve got a lot on your mind.” Burke slung an arm around Eli’s back and rested his head on Eli’s shoulder.
“I do.” Shit! Did he tell the kid what was really going on or did he make up some stupid lie? No, it was lying by omission that got him into the mess with Kassie and Jensen to begin with. “I was thinking about this thing between us.”
Burke stiffened. “Oh, yeah?”
Eli pulled him closer. Burke’s trembling voice sounded scared. “Yeah. I like having you here with me. You make these four walls feel like home.”
All of the tension drained out of Burke’s body at those words. “I didn’t want to say anything, just in case you didn’t feel the same way, but I get that feeling here too. That this house feels like a home.”
Eli had never been more relieved in his life. “Do you want to…” Faltering, unsure of his words, Eli’s mouth slammed shut.
Burke’s lips curved into a smile. He pressed a kiss to Eli’s naked shoulder. “Do I want to, what? Fuck you? Fall asleep in your arms? Make you breakfast? Stay here forever?” Tilting Eli’s face to the side, Burke brushed their lips together.
“Yes.” Eli let out the breath he’d been holding tight.
“Yes, to which thing?” Burke was grinning at him.
This was the moment of truth. Did he wimp out and tell Burke that he only wanted him to spend the night and make breakfast? Or did he go for broke and just admit his feelings? His stomach churned with anxiety. “Yes, to all of it.” His heart hammered harder when those words were past his lips. There was no taking them back now.
“I think you’re the bravest man I know, Elias Dixon.” Burke’s dark eyes glowed with sincerity.
Those weren’t exactly the words Eli had been expecting. “You think I’m brave?”
“I do.” Burke pulled the cop into his arms. He held him tight, as if he never wanted to let go. “You kissed your best friend on your wedding day, even though you knew deep down he wasn’t going to kiss you back. Now, only three years later, you’re telling me that you want more after we’ve only known each other for such a short time.” Burke kissed the top of Eli’s head. “So, yeah, I think you’re brave.”
Eli held Burke as tight as he could. He smelled of floral soap and something else Eli dared to think of as hope.
“I want all of those things too, Eli. I want you. I want to be yours. Forever.” Burke whispered that last word, as if his own bravery had faltered a step.
