Page 63 of Little Bird
Dangerous.
“Making out,” I whisper. I don’t know if it’s the right answer or the wrong one—if he’s going to kiss me or shove away from me and walk out—and I still can’t understand why he’s taking this so personally. He and Sally were always together. Everyone knew that. They never tried to hide it, and they sure as well weren’t quiet about what they did together.
I know, because it broke me a little bit every time I saw them. I was his best friend, but I was also just his stepsister.
No matter how much I wanted to be more.
His eyes suddenly soften and snap back and forth between mine, his gaze searching for something I don’t understand, and when he does push away it’s a slow movement, like he can’t stand to be parted from me.
I want to reach out and pull him back. Tell him to stay. Remind him how good it felt when we were in the darkness of the kitchen when we were sixteen, me on his lap and his hands on my hips. I want to tell him that whatever he’s feeling right now, he can tell me.
That seeing him keep secrets from me feels like he’s tearing out a piece of my soul.
Instead, I keep my mouth shut as his presence draws away, and then turn back to the food. “So I’m planning dinners. What’s your favorite thing to eat these days? Still macaroni and cheese with hot dogs?”
That brings a laugh from his side of the pantry, and I feel the tension drain out of the space.
“Don’t be ridiculous. I’ve never liked macaroni and cheese.”
This has me snorting with laughter, because nothing could be further from the truth. “Are you serious? You went through a phase where you made us eat it for a week!”
He throws a bag of pasta at me. “That’s because it was the only thing I could cook!”
I grab a can of something off the shelf and throw it back at him. “And whose fault is that? I was always trying to teach you how to do more than boil water!”
He catches the can neatly and stares at me like I’ve just tried to actually murder him. With a can of soup. Then he launches himself at me like we’re actually at war. I dodge him, shrieking, and run right into the wall, sending more cans clattering to the ground and a vase flying. I bounce off the wall, though, and run for the other end of the pantry, breathless with laughter.
“You never even made the cheese right!” I toss over my shoulder. “Always added too much water!”
He comes pounding after me. “That’s because I hated doing it!”
“Or because you were too distracted by Sally Hennings!”
I swerve and duck, already knowing what’s coming, and hear him laughing behind me.
“That’s it,” he mutters. “That’s the last time you’re bringing up her name around me.”
Seconds later his hands are wrapped around my waist and he’s whirling me around, the walls of the pantry spinning past with my speed. I wriggle out of his grip and make for the door of the pantry, intent on getting away, but Gunner appears in the opening before I can get out.
And there are thunder clouds in his expression.
“What the fuck are you two doing in here?” he snaps. His eyes go to the food on the floor and the shattered vase and then turn directly to Gabe. “You thought you needed to get in here and destroy half our food? What are you, ten?”
I don’t have to see Gabe’s face to know the look he’s wearing right now. He’s never liked getting in trouble, and Gunner seems intent on seeing the worst in my stepbrother these days. If I know Gabe, his face is going from betrayal and confusion straight to anger at the unfair assumption.
“We’re throwing away food that’s expired, actually,” I say quickly. “Making room for new stuff. Stuff that’s not stale. Or spoiled.”
That’s not how all those cans ended up on the ground, but Gunner doesn’t need to know that. Besides, it’s mostly the truth. I was checking expiration dates when Gabe came in.
Gunner scowls at us both but shakes his head and turns away instead of saying anything else, and I feel the tension in Gabe as we watch his father walk through the kitchen and back outside.
“What did he do, come in just to yell at us?” Gabe asks sharply.
“Seems like overkill,” I reply.
Though given what I’ve seen of Gunner’s relationship with Gabe, I can’t say I’m surprised.
My phone rings then, cutting off the thought, and I glance at it to see it’s my mom.
