Page 13 of Sliding into Love
“It’s been really good actually. The team is amazing. A little weird at times, but in a good sort of way. They’ve built a family between them, and Kenneth seems to be at the center of it all.”
Bell freezes at my words. “How so?”
Finn looks up from the page he's coloring to stare at me and Bell. He’d greeted me at first, then lost himself in the image he’s working on. It’s funny that he chooses now to tune into things.
“Why does Royce have their guilty face on, Daddy? Is there a problem with the team?”
“No, little one. Nothing’s wrong. I think Royce has been keeping something from me this week though. Care to share?”
The question is directed in a way that I can’t think of a work-around. But the true answer, the one my brother wants, is that I’m wildly attracted to the man who used to bully me. Or rather, the passive observer to my childhood bully.
And that is another problem.
Let’s not add to it the other facts like how he’s leaving the team after the transition or how I’m not even sure of his sexuality. We’ve not ventured into anything that personal, nor should we.
“I haven’t kept anything from you, Bell. Don’t be so dramatic.” I roll my eyes at him to cover my nerves.
He hums. “I don’t know if I believe you.”
“You don’t have to believe me. Now do you want to know more about the team or not? My bed is calling me.”
It’s a lie. I’m not tired at all. If anything, I’m wired. The deceit of my attraction to Kenneth mixes with my need to avoid admitting said attraction aloud. My skin buzzes with the need to leave, to move.
It’s another hour before my brother finishes interrogating me about how work is going. As soon as I leave his place, I head home at a fast clip. We don’t live far from one another, meaning my condo only takes twenty minutes to get to after factoring in traffic.
Once behind my closed and locked door, I make a beeline for the bedroom. It’s not until I’m inside that I realize what I’m even planning on doing. My clothes fall to the floor in a rainfall of fine fabrics and accessories. I don’t even take the time to lay it all out neatly like I normally do. All I know is that I have to get naked as fast as possible.
I lay across my bed, eyes closed as I try to calm my breathing. I think of rainbows and sunsets. Of jazz music and slow dances.All the normal techniques I use to keep my body in check are no good.
It’s impossible to ignore. The desire raging through me is obvious in the hard length protruding from my lower half.
I stare at my cock with disdain. How dare my own body betray me so viciously? Can’t it understand we shouldn’t be attracted to Kenneth? We shouldn’t want him to touch us. We shouldn’t ache to know how he’d feel wrapped around us. We shouldn’t crave him when he’s away.
A week.
It’s only been a fucking week, and he’s already blown through my defenses.
Not that he’s trying to. If he was, I’d be well and truly screwed.
I groan at the double entendre.
There’s no use in trying to stop what’s already started. Besides, I really can’t go to sleep like this. With that logic in mind, I wrap my fist around my unwelcome erection. Stroking from tip to root, I allow myself a moment to drop my defenses completely. I don’t think of my hate or my need to get back at Kenneth.
Instead, I focus on all the things I’ve found myself enjoying this week. Things like how he smells—all woodsy and fresh, or how he looks when he concentrates. I focus on the way his body fills out a suit, and the equally sexy way a pair of jeans and a tee accentuate his shape.
Fuck, what I wouldn’t give to dress him up. I bet he’d be a fun doll to play with.
An image of him naked and waiting for my instruction flits through my mind. It sends a wave of pleasure rushing through me. My strokes quicken as I chase the high.
Another minute passes of that vision before it shifts. Now he’s laid out on a bed—on my bed—and he’s weeping as I take mytime drawing out his pleasure. His pleas for me to let him come echo around the room, useless in the face of the power I hold over him.
In the vision, I only let him come after I’ve covered him in bite marks and make him tell me I’m the only person to bring him to his knees. Of course, this particular power play has the effect of not only making daydream Kenneth come, but also real-life me. I explode in a powerful orgasm. It’s so potent I wind up tremoring with aftershocks long after my length is done spending itself over my hand.
I run my clean hand over my face. How the fuck did I think this would relieve anything? I feel ten times worse now. Not because I came to an erotic image of the man I’d sworn to hate. No, it’s worse now because I don’t know how I’ll ever look at him again and not see him laid out while begging me to come.
Fuck. My. Life.
The morning after my impromptu solo session starts with a missed alarm. Clearly I needed the sleep since I feel a million times better this morning, but sleeping in does not make a successful career. I can’t let my own out of whack desires throw off my plans.
