Page 40 of Sliding into Love
“And yet it's not,” Carmen says. “This person is on your mind all the time. You think about them, you want them. You long to be around them. Even when you don't want to, you're constantly taking in their emotions or how they feel or what they want. Maybe you see, I don't know, a stuffed baseball mitt and decide that you want to get it for them.
“Any of this sound familiar? Because if so, that is having romantic feelings for someone. It's liking someone, possibly even loving them, if you really want to get technical about it.”
I groan. “Don't use the L word, Carmen. You've already put one hex on me. Don't do another.”
She cackles like she's an evil witch. A few people turn their heads. I shake my head at her, smiling, because how can I not with a sister this theatrical?
“You deserve happiness, Royce. You deserve to have someone who worships the ground you walk on and thinks highly of you. Does this person do that?”
I shrug.
“Not really, but we aren't really exploring any of that. We work and then we have these tense moments and then we pretend they don't happen until the cycle repeats itself.”
“Okay, well, maybe the first step here is actually talking to this person and admitting there's more going on. If you can both do that much, then you can see where it goes. Be brave, little sibling.”
Be brave,I repeat, mulling over the words.
I've been brave my whole life.
I'm tired of being brave.
I'm tired of being strong.
It's not that I want someone to take care of me. I just hate having to make tough decisions.
But if I really think about it, Kenneth isn't a tough decision.
I know what I want.
It just doesn't feel right.
Well, maybe deep down it does, and I'm just fighting myself for no good reason.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
KENNETH
Christmas isan unfortunate event in the Meyer family. Not only do my parents always host an annual Christmas party, it's an entire who's who of people that I quite frankly don't want to spend time with. Anyone who is rich and not trotting off to some fancy destination for the holiday comes to my parents' house and brags about everything they've accomplished during the year.
Considering how much I can't stand to listen to people brag, unless it's of course the guys on the team, you can imagine it's a nightmare for me to attend. But given that I am Kenneth Meyer and share the last name of the host, I have to be there.
Plus, it's not like I have anywhere else I could go. My options are quite limited.
I know Gil would probably let me come to his place. Really anyone on the team would, but I’d feel like a burden and a burden is not what I want to be. I’m familiar with what it's like to have one of those. Two of them actually.
My parents.
“Mother. Father,” I say, when I greet them in the receiving line right past the entryway of my childhood home. Their butleropened the door to let me in just a moment ago and now I'm stuck in line with all the other people.
They smile cordially. My mother gives me a kiss on the cheek and my father claps me on the shoulder while shaking my hand in that manly way one does to be affectionate but not too affectionate.
“Good to see you, son,” he says, nearly shouting the words to draw attention.
Mom beams, taking my hand between hers. “It's so good to see you. We have several people here who are wonderful. I think you would like to meet them, yes?”
She doesn't have to say who the people are for me to know that they're women she's interested in setting me up with. Women that I have no desire to even speak to, but I will for the sake of my mother and saving face for this party.
“Sounds good, Mother. I'll go get a drink while you finish greeting your guests. I'm sure you'll be able to find me later.”
