Page 67 of Sliding into Love
I snort at the way he tries to use all the various types of descriptors for me. "Your Majesty is enough," I say. "Besides, you don't need to get all worked up about anything right now. It's simply grocery shopping. I can do my work when we come back as long as we swing by my place and get my laptop."
"You want to work here too?"
"Well, I don't really want to go in the office. It's kind of boring. Besides, I can keep you company while you clean."
"So it's not about helping me clean, it's just about being here. Isn't that that body doubling thing people do? I've seen it online," he mumbles.
I smile widely at his adorable nature. "I don't know what it's called, but I will say that it's never fun to do all that stuff alone. I can sit here and talk to you and answer emails and stuff. You don't have to worry about me getting in the way, and you won't feel like you're by yourself. Plus, as soon as you're done, then we can spend time together."
"Like what?" he asks.
"Like whatever you want. Watch a movie, make food together, go for a walk. I don't know. What do you do?"
Wide eyed, he repeats, "What do I do?”
“Are you just going to answer everything I say with a question, Kenny?" I say, voice dry.
He lifts his hands in surrender. "I don't mean to be a pain. I'm just trying to understand what's happening right now. Am I dreaming or is this some type of coffee, hot chocolate, sugar-induced psychosis?"
I stand from my seat again and move in front of him. When he turns to face me, I drop into his lap instead of kneeling again. These boots aren't really meant for me to squat.
His hands immediately move to my waist, holding me still like he's worried I'm going to get right back up. Placing my hands on his shoulders, I look him in his eye as I tell him the reality of things.
"I know we said that this doesn't fix everything, and it doesn't. There's a lot of years of history between us, Kenny. But I can't deny that when I woke up this morning, my first thought was, 'I want to feed him' instead of 'I want to run'. And even now, I'm suggesting coming back to spend more time with you because being away from you just doesn't feel right. So if that's too much for you and you want me to go, just say so. But if any part of you wants to spend more time with me, then just go with it, Little Menace. Let me be here to support you and to take care of you. Are you able to do that?"
"No one ever takes care of me," he confesses.
My heart breaks a little for him because even if his asshole tendencies from our youth were wrong, knowing that his parents have treated him this way his whole life makes me a little more understanding of it all. How is someone meant to be good if they've never been shown what is good? How can people have compassion if all they've ever been taught is hatred and disgust or worse, ambivalence?
My parents were the complete opposite. They were doting and kind. There isn't a single good thing about me that doesn't stem from them. But for Kenny, it's not the same. So I'll have to be the one to show him. I'll be his guide, his teacher. I'll be his Dom.
The thought brings me up short. While dominance is a trait that I have accepted as a part of who I am, it's not anything I've put into practice with a partner in a long time. Even then, those were only during special trips out of town when I could visit the club. My buddy Patrick always made sure I had someone to set the scene with who wouldn't try to tie me down in a committed relationship considering how far away I live.
Thinking about Pat makes me remember the last conversation we had when they wanted me to open a branch of their club here in Bellport. If I didn't think my parents would lose their shit finding out, I totally would.
Then again, I don't have to necessarily attach it to the Bellport family name, do I? How many businesses do I have that don't have my name on them? How many places do I own that no one knows I'm even a part of?
I come back to the present when Kenny groans. I realize I'm shifting in his lap, likely because I'm going over things in my head, and I can never really do that while sitting still.
"Little Menace," I say. "My apologies for distracting you. Where were we?"
Kenny swallows, his eyes moving over my body like his mouth did earlier. I can feel my cock harden, and I know we're seconds away from heading back to his bedroom if I don't get hold of the situation.
"Where were we?" I repeat, my tone more firm.
"You were telling me that you care and are here and to not take everything we said last night too seriously. Did I get that right?"
I laugh, then kiss the tip of his nose. "That you did, Little Menace. You're being so good right now. I'm going to give you a quick kiss and then we're going to finish breakfast so that we can go to the grocery store. Understood?"
He nods quickly, puckering his lips with the move. I suppress the laugh that wants to come as I give him the fastest kiss I possibly can. I feel his hands tighten on my waist as if he wants to keep me still but knows he can't.
When I pull back, his eyes stay closed and his mouth curves into the most beautiful smile I think I've ever seen. I can't resist going in for another kiss. This time I linger a little longer, letting the emotion I feel seep into the connection. Kenny's grip loosens as his body melts.
This time when we pull apart, he actually sighs. I smile, happy that I've let down my guard enough to see where this goes. I'm tired of the hot and cold. I would much rather explore what's between us than to keep pushing it down.
Besides, it could be just exactly what we need.
I should have known the grocery store would become an adventure in patience. Not because Kenny does anything wrong. It's truly because I know far too many fucking people in this town. I guess everyone shops this early in the morning because I see so many familiar faces. Several of them also recognize Kenny.
