Page 12 of The Baby Clause
“Pip-Philip.” I mumbled.
“He doesn’t have one.”
Jerry was trying to avoid looking my way as my eyes bore a hole in the back of his head. Fuck, he’s stubborn.
“His parents should pick his name, but we’ve sort of called him that till we find them.” Jerry was tugging on his ear flaps in another sign of nerves.
“His parents are you guys, so I think it’s your decision, don’t you think?” Martha was peering over her glasses at us.
“Ugh, no? I only found him. He’s not mine…” Jerry edged closer to me, almost tucking himself behind me.
“Sure, he is… Didn’t your parents ever tell you about the Christmas Stork.” Martha’s eyes held a hint of mirth.
“The what?” We said in unison.
“Christmas Stork. He’s like the Easter Bunny, but instead of Easter it’s Christmas and instead of Eggs he delivers babies.”
“Are you kidding me right now? Because I know for a fact that my mom gave me a chocolate egg and bought my presents.” Jerry’s hands were starting to twitch another sure sign that his stress levels were climbing.
“What’s with the younger generation these days thinking they know it all? No, young man, you are quite mistaken. The Easter Bunny exists and so does the Christmas Stork. How else do you explain your son?”
“He’s not…” Came Jerry’s weak reply. I wasn’t going to allow her to upset him.
“Martha…!” My tone was still warm but also held a note of caution. I’d only got Jerry back on an even keel and I didn’t want him back to doubting himself.
“The Stork doesn’t make mistakes. He was delivered to you, to both of you. You accepted him into your home, you touched the certificate, you’ve even chosen his name. He’s yours.”
“Martha, I know you mean well, but we’re investigating how the pup came to be at Jerry’s. We’re not ruling anything out at this stage, but we don’t have much to go on.”
“No, and you won’t because…”
“He was delivered by the Stork, yeah you said. Jerry, do you want to grab whatever you want and we’ll head back?”
As the pack’s alpha, I could tell if one of mine was lying to me, but Martha’s scent hadn’t changed. It sounded bat-shit crazy to me, but to Martha it was 100 percent the truth. Jere wandered back, his arms full, and at the top of the pile was a small stuffed Rudolph. He gave me a sheepish smile before handing his bundle of goods over to Martha to ring up. Less than five minutes later, we were back in my truck and on our way, only now Pip had a fluffy friend.
“So… what carriage of the crazy train do you think Martha’s riding?” Jerry had finished putting the shopping away and was removing Pip from his carrier. He looked around for somewhere to put him before deciding that it was my turn to hold the baby.
“You know, on some level, I think Martha believes every word she says. I’m just not sure, I do.” I was wondering how long it would take Jerry to get around to that topic again. He was being skeptical, so was I. I’d never heard of a Christmas Stork, but as I’d said before, weird shit was happening and it was looking like this was falling under that category.
Tomorrow, the lab would have the results and we’d be a step closer to figuring this whole thing out. I had my deputies contacting the local hospitals, checking on recent births and following up where each child was. If a kid was missing, I wanted to know about it. Only how was I going to hand him back over to his parents when I’d already done what Jerry had tried to avoid. I’d grown attached to the little guy.
“So, you don’t believe that he was delivered by the ‘Christmas Stork’.” Jerry did those bunny ear quote marks with his fingers.
“No, I don’t, I think he was snatched away by someone, who then panicked and left him here. I’ve got my men checking. We’ll find where he belongs. But first I think this little guy could do with some formula and a nappy change, maybe not in that order…”
“You smelt it; you deal with it.” And there was his sassiness back in full flow.
“I’m sure it’s your turn to deal with Mr. Stinky?”
“Fine…” I could tell he wasn’t happy; the glare was my first sign and his deep sigh was the other.
Jerry
I’d drawn the short straw and had to feed and change the kit. If I was going to do this, then I was going to make sure I was prepared, unlike when Mason had done it. I plucked the things I needed from the cupboard and turned to face Mr. Stinky who just gurgled at me, a small grin on his face.
Oh, trying to look all cute, will you, hmm? Well, I’m on to you. Yep, you aren’t going to lure me into your web, nope.I was immune to all forms of cuteness, and I had no idea why so many kitty pictures were filling my news feed–yeah, right? Whatever proves nothing. I pulled on the thick elbow length rubber gloves, followed by the apron and finally my gas mask. Then I turned to face Mason and waited.
“What the fuck have you got on? You look like an extra from some crazy slasher movie.”
