Page 76 of Wrapped Up in Christmas Hope
She’d looked up Hotshots and Smokejumpers online. Statistics of injuries—some serious, some fatal—were much higher than with other firefighters. She’d been right to tell him she couldn’t do this. She couldn’t.
“I...I’m going to tell Greyson goodnight.”
Her grandmother gave her an odd look, but Morgan shook her head.
“I’m fine.” Not really. Inside she was falling apart for so many reasons. “I just want to tell my son goodnight. My son who says he wants to do this for a living when he grows up.” Her voice broke but prior to rushing from the room, she managed to say, “I’ll be praying extra hard that he changes his mind.”
“You’re not your usual bundle of sunshine today. You that upset they’re letting me out of this joint?”
“Devastated,” Morgan assured John, smiling as he swung his legs over the side of the bed without assistance. “I think they’re making a huge mistake and that I need to talk with the medical director to get things cleared up.”
He used his hands to push up against the bed to help himself stand. “Bite your tongue, girl. I’ve took all those pills you keep throwing at me. I deserve to be set free.”
“Set free?” She arched a brow at him. “You make it sound as if we’ve held you hostage.”
“Guess that would be my own body doing that,” he admitted, taking a step, then another. His gait was cautious and he had to use his quad-cane, but he was getting stronger each day. “Either way, doc says I’m well enough that I can go home. I’m out of this place just as soon as doc gives the final okay.”
She didn’t blame him for being excited about being back in his space, with his things. As much as she loved Grampy and Grammy, she planned to find a place of her own after the holidays. She’d forever be thankful to her grandparents, but it was time she and Greyson had their own home, again.
“Don’t think that you no longer being here means I’ll stop worrying about you,” she admitted, walking beside him as he made his way toward the doorway.
“That’s something you do too much,” John accused.
“Worry?” she asked, glancing toward him.
He nodded. “You need to stop.”
Morgan stared at him, then sighed. “You’re right. I worry too much, but I don’t know how to stop. It seems to have become ingrained.”
“It’s useless, you know. Worrying doesn’t change anything and it robs you of your happiness.”
“I’d say easy for you to say, but I know you’ve dealt with your own tragedies.”
“And survived them. You will, too.” Leaning out to steady himself against the doorjamb, he paused, “What’s triggered this relapse? I can tell something’s changed since I saw you yesterday.”
Everything changed the night of Sarah and Bodie’s party. From that point onward, she’d felt the loss of Andrew’s absence from her and Greyson’s lives. Last night had just served to remind her that she’d been foolish to ever think she wanted him with them in the first place.
“There was a fire at a factory in the industrial park last night.”
John’s face grew concerned. “Was anyone hurt?”
“An employee and two firefighters. Jules just had scrapes and bruises, but the other two people are in the hospital still with serious injuries.”
John’s blue gaze studied her. “Not Andrew?”
Just the memory of not knowing if he was okay had Morgan feeling jittery, but she reminded herself he was fine and shook her head. “No, I’m told he’s well.”
John frowned. “You’re told? Why don’t you know firsthand?”
“I’ve not seen him. We’re not a couple. We never were.”
“Pfft. So you say.”
“It’s just as well that we weren’t. He’s leaving for wildland firefighter training in California in a few weeks. He plans to be a smokejumper.”
John shrugged. “So?”
“So, even if he was interested in a committed relationship, I couldn’t deal with how I’d worry about him and he’d be far away for who knows how long? It’s best that we were never a couple.”
