Page 80 of Twisted Pact
“Safe and free don’t have to be mutually exclusive.”
“In our world, sometimes they do.”
I push myself off the bed. The room is too small for proper pacing, but I need to move. Need to do something with the restless energy building inside me.
“I can’t live like this,” I tell him. “With you making decisions about my life based on what you think is best for me.”
“I know this world better than you do. I know what the threats are and how to handle them.”
“And I’m supposed to just trust your judgment? Just accept that you know what’s best for me better than I do?”
“Yes.”
The blunt answer makes me stop pacing. “Just like that? No discussion? No consideration for what I want?”
Alexei crosses the room and grabs my shoulders, shaking me just enough to get my attention. “You don’t understand the kind of people we’re dealing with. The things they’re willing to do.”
The accusation makes anger flare in my chest. “I’m writing a dissertation on organized crime families. I understand the risks better than you think.”
“Understanding the theory isn’t the same as living the reality.”
“So, I should just defer to your superior knowledge and experience? Accept that you know better than me about everything?”
“About this? Yes.”
I wrench away from him. “That’s not how relationships work, Alexei. Equal partners don’t just submit to each other’s judgment on everything. Your decisions could get me killed, too, you know. The restaurant proved that. Your need to publicly claim me put us both in danger.”
He flinches like I hit him. “That was different.”
“How is your lack of control different from my supposed naivety?”
“I was protecting what’s mine.”
“And there it is. I’m something you own. Something you get to control because you’ve decided I belong to you.”
“That’s not what I meant.”
“It’s exactly what you meant. You can’t help yourself. Everything comes back to possession with you. Let me ask you something: When’s the last time you trusted someone to make their own decisions about their safety?”
“Trust has nothing to do with this.”
“Trust has everything to do with this. If you trusted me, you’d let me make informed choices about my life instead of making decisions for me.”
“Trust gets people killed.”
Something in his tone makes me look at him more closely. There’s pain there, an old pain that goes deeper than our situation.
“What happened, Alexei? Who did you trust that got someone killed?”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“It matters to me. It matters to help understand why you can’t let anyone make choices.”
“Drop it, Mila.”
“No. If I’m going to spend the rest of my life dealing with your control issues, I deserve to know where they come from.”
“You don’t need to know anything except that trust gets people killed.” He stands abruptly. “We’re getting married.”
