Page 106 of To Bring You Back
He’d tried to take on the role of hero to earn his redemption instead of accepting it as a gift. In the process, he’d saved Matt from a confrontation with Officer Cullen that could’ve led to an arrest before Matt had made any more poor choices. What would continuing to save Harper cost in the long run?
He sent another message to security, asking for someone to come take over, and then tried to make the best of the time he had.
“Jesus Christ loves you, Harper. He wants what’s best for you, and He’ll never fail you. Following Him does involve changing—constantly, for all of us—but He doesn’t leave us to figure that out without His help. If you want a relationship with Him, it’s got to be about you and Him, not you and me, because there is no you and me. The only thing that’s permanent for any of us is God.”
That last part was as true for him as for Harper. Adeline had labeled him a friend, but she might not even allow that to continue. Not when she realized he would never stop waiting for her to love him the way he loved her.
As he got to his feet, he prayed for the next right step.
“I did it to myself. Not the first time—I did fall in your apartment—but the second time.” Harper didn’t turn from the water, but she motioned at her face. “Everyone cared so much when they thought someone attacked me. I thought it’d make you care.”
How could she say that like he hadn’t come through for her time and again?
But he never would’ve let her come to Havenridge without those injuries, just like he wouldn’t have ventured to this park if not for her post. She wasn’t herself tonight, and he couldn’t guess what she would’ve done if no one had found her. Maybe nothing. Maybe something awful.
Gannon could still recall the sound of Fitz’s mom sobbing at the funeral.
“I do care.” His voice had thickened. “There is help and there is hope, but you have to decide to take it.”
She didn’t reply.
Despite standing right behind her, he couldn’t reach her. She needed a better hero than he’d ever been.
“Your assistant and Karina are coming to spend time with you. I’ll make sure you’re not alone tonight, and I can put you in contact with a local pastor tomorrow.”
Still nothing.
He looked to the stairs and spotted a member of the security team descending. When the bodyguard reached the end of the pier, he paused, apparently waiting for Gannon’s direction.
Okay, God. I trust you. Be the hero.
He motioned the guard to move in and walked back to shore alone.
Gannon trudged toward his room.A sniffle drew his eyes to the top of the stairs.
Adeline stood on the landing, a laptop hugged awkwardly to her chest. She still wore the sweats she’d had on when he’d last seen her, but now she sounded like she was crying.
“What’s wrong?”
She shook her head and tightened her grip on the laptop. “I’m going to see Tegan.”
“Is she up?” What time was it, anyway? Still dark out the great room windows, but he’d lost track of the hour and wouldn’t take his focus off Adeline long enough to check his phone. He took three more steps and stopped two shy of the top. When he touched her arm, she tucked her chin and looked away.
“What happened? Something with Olivia? Or Tim?” Gannon was on a roll tonight. So what if he had to fire one more person?
Shaking her head again, she sidestepped to the other end of the staircase and descended the first step. “It’s nothing you can fix, Gannon.” She took another step. “It’s the way things are.” Her socks padded against the stairs as she found a rhythm and stuck to it, leaving him alone and in the dark.
Everything in him screamed to go after her, get the story from her, and find a way to fix it.
Trying to fix everything had gotten him in trouble with Harper and with Matt.
God, isn’t Adeline different?
Apparently not, or he wouldn’t feel this conviction that he needed to let God handle this one.
This was what the better lover song had been about—letting God care for Adeline instead of trying to himself—but he’d tried that.
Tried it for eight years, since the funeral.
