Page 70 of To Believe In You
He scratched his scalp. Had she finally managed to fluster him? “I think being a father would be the hardest thing I’ve ever done.” He fit his hands into his pockets. “And the most worthwhile thing. If that day ever comes.” He seemed to have regained his composure, and he studied her now as though he’d asked her a probing question in return.
She fiddled with her purse strap. “I like that perspective.”
“But?”
“Hard isn’t the first description I think of. Fulfilling, maybe.”
“I’m sure it’s that too.” Matt’s focus dipped to the keys in her hand. “What are you up to now?”
If she was to take the lead as he’d said, she ought to invite him to lunch. After all, he wasn’t as opposed to kids as she’d thought. They had a chance, didn’t they? Instead, she found herself telling him she was going to run errands and then reward herself for it with an apple crisp latte.
“You want me to hang around in case Shane shows up?”
She shook her head. “It’s been a week. If Shane were going to resurface, he would’ve done so days ago. Considering he’s broke enough to need Dad to fund his ticket, he wouldn’t have paid for a hotel this whole time. At some point, life needs to go back to normal.”
“Normal’s boring.”
“And yet, it’s what I do best.”
“I can learn a lot from you.” His eyes sparkled with kind amusement. “But, okay. Call me if you need me.”
There he went again, putting the ball in her court. One of these days, she’d work up the nerve to return it.
* * *
Matt straightened awayfrom the fridge when he heard the condo’s front door open. A moment later, Tim tossed his keys on the counter, sighed, and spotted him.
Lunch would have to wait.
Matt shut the appliance. “Everything all right?”
Tim’s jaw shifted as he shook his head. “You might not agree with me sending Issy to boarding school, but it’s best for her.”
He nodded. Since when did Tim ever explain himself? The guy usually made up his mind, acted, and let people think what they wanted.
Splotches formed on Tim’s cheeks as he rambled on. “My ex is married again. We’re on as decent of terms as possible. But this other thing I hadn’t even thought about in years suddenly came back up.” He dipped his chin and, with it, his attention. “This time, I don’t know if it’s something I can right.”
“I’ve been there.” Matt could still recall the roaring despair he’d experienced, standing beside August Peltier’s casket. “We can never truly right our wrongs. That’s why Christ paid for them. When we believe, He cancels our debt.”
“But He doesn’t undo the past. You—there are people who wouldn’t be so happy to call it all even, and I don’t know how to fix that.”
How much time and energy had Matt spent on making amends with the people he’d wronged? He still wasn’t done paying back his parents. Yet making amends wasn’t the first step. “Getting right with God is the main thing, and He’ll help you from there.”
“Get your head out of the sky. This isn’t about God.”
If Matt kept pushing, Tim would get angrier. Time to meet him where he was and trust God to connect the dots. “Okay. What’s eating away at you?”
Tim pulled out one of the seats at the peninsula, sank onto it, then dropped his head into his hands.
Cold, gnarled fingers squeezed Matt’s gut. “Was it illegal?”
“No.”
The dread-filled pressure didn’t let up. “It has to do with Awestruck?”
“Yes.”
He rubbed his stomach, the ache there lessening. “I’m sure they’ll forgive you, whatever it is.” It couldn’t be worse than the years of offenses Matt had racked up.
