Page 94 of Shape Of My Heart
Josh staredat the phone in his hands and set it on the kitchen counter. Once again there was no answer. It was clear that Amy wasn’t coming back, but he didn’t know if he could give up and accept that. He didn’t know if he could accept that she was gone from his life and nevercomingback.
He thought he’d played all his cards when he told her he loved her. But he still had one more to play. One more to play that might not be worth it but he had to try. Maybe his persistence would make her see thetruth.
He picked the phone up again and called Corey. Corey had been a massive strength to him when these sorts of things happened. He was close with a lot of the guys, Like Gage and Ty, but he’d known Corey the longest. They’d been through lifetogether.
“Hey man,” Corey answered after the second ring. Josh noticed that since this recent saga with Amy, Corey was within his grasp the minute Josh needed him. Probably because he was worried Josh would turn back to alcohol. Josh had no intention of falling back into old bad habits. “Youokay?”
Okay? No, he was so far from it. “I’m hanging inthere.”
“Do you want me to come around? Or we could go shoot some pool atthebar.”
“Yeah, maybe. I was thinking I’d go to Gabriella’s and try my luck.” He knew Amy was staying there. It was Hilda whotoldhim.
“I won’t say no. All you can doistry.”
“I just wish she would talk to me and that I could convince her that I’m telling the truth, but she doesn’t trust me.” Josh wished that Allegra hadn’t come to his house and destroyed his relationship. He leaned his behind against the counter and gazed through the window at the palm trees blowing out against the wind. “Corey, if this is it and I’ve lost her, then I really would have losteverything.”
His voice shook and took on a frail edge he didn’trecognize.
“Just keep trying. That’s all you can do. I’m sure once she cools off she’ll startlistening.”
Cools off? Five days had already passed and Amy was still mad at him. Add her distrust to the equation and he didn’t really see any hope. But…he would try. He’d try forever if heneededto.
“I’ll keeptrying.”
“Let me know what happens,” Corey said. At least he sounded like hehadhope.
Josh clicked the phone off and continued to gaze through the window. It was seven o’clock. He was hoping it wouldn’t be too late to go to Gabriella’s. He didn’t want to impose and look like the crazy boyfriend trying to win his girl back. Even though technically he was heading thatwayfast.
He just wished it never happened. And while he had no fault in this occurrence, he was to blame. That was what happened when you went with women like Allegra. At the time when he hooked up with her he never imagined that he’d meet Amy, or more significantly that he would ever feel this way about anyone. Like his life would have no meaning if they weren’taround.
Well, here goes. Another attempt forforgiveness.
He turned around to go but stopped when he saw her. Right there, standing before him in the kitchen looking like she’d been plucked fromhismind.
It occurred to him that this could have been one of those times when his brain conjured her up and made him see what it wanted to help him get by. But this was no hallucination, this was the real Amy. He could always tell the difference between the real andfantasyAmy.
Josh looked at her, dressed in a pink t-shirt and denim shorts. He loved when she wore anything like that. The pink against her bronze skin and light blonde hair always made him want to stare. And her long, sculpted legs on show in those shorts was any man’s idea of adream.
She looked back at him with intensity and he couldn’t tell what she was thinking. Then an awful feeling of dread filled him as he realized why shewashere.
It was to get her things. She came to get her things. He brought his hand up to his face andwinced.
“Amy.” Emotion weighed so heavily on him that he didn’t know what to say first. So he started with the most pressing thing. “Please no, don’t tell me you’re here to get your things. You have to believe that I would never do anything tohurtyou.”
She brought her hands together and held them to her chest. She nodded, but he still didn’t know what she wasthinking.
“I know. You never would, and you never have,” she breathed, tears spilling down hercheeks.
Josh straightened up and gazed at her. Now he could see. Now he could see that she believed him. “Youbelieveme?”
“Yes.” She pushed a wayward golden strand behindherear.
“How come?” He knew he should thank his lucky stars that she believed him and not press with questions as to why. However, he wanted to know what had changed her mind. Did she speak to Allegra? Did someone else convince her of the truth? He wantedtoknow.
“I love you.” A tear ran down her cheek as she spoke. “I love you so much and I trust you. I trust you, Josh, and that is all I need to know that you were telling the truth.” The fifty-ton weight that had rested on him since this whole thing happened lifted off hisshoulders.
As he took her words in, his lungs expanded, relieving the constriction he felt from fear and he could breatheagain.
